Go Where You Are Uncomfortable

I felt the pangs of despair, I cried the tears of hopelessness.

In the waiting, I thought I would never get whole. 

But here I am, hopeful.

Here I am, proving them wrong.

Here I am, with my whole heart. 

I’ve been kicked around, accused, rejected.

I got up every time. I kept getting up until they stopped and marveled.

“How is she still getting up? Shouldn’t she be in the corner, depressed and hopeless?”

Then I will point to God and I’ll keep looking up because you never failed me, you never gave up on me. Your hands kept reaching for me, you kept lifting me up.

It was You all along. 

Just like dating, you are putting yourself out there again.

You are putting your heart out and you are scared that you may get hurt again.

But don’t stop being yourself, now is YOUR time to shine. 

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Protect The Word God Gave You

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When you are in a transition season, you will often be tested.

“The farmer sows the word. Some are like the seeds along the path, where the word is sown. As soon as they hear it, Satan comes and takes away the word that was sown in them.

Others are like the seeds sown on rocky places. They hear the word and at once receive it with joy. But they themselves have no root, and they remain for only a season. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away.

Still others are like the seeds sown among the thorns. They hear the word, but the cares of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth, and the desire for other things come in and choke the word, and it becomes unfruitful.

Yet others are like the seeds sown on good soil. They hear the word, receive it, and produce a crop—thirtyfold, sixtyfold, or a hundredfold.” Matthew 13:18-23

When I was younger, I used to tell everyone what God told me (just like Joseph with his family). In truth, I wanted approval. I wanted someone to say “oh wow, goodness, you are going to be this and that, I am so proud of you and I totally believe what God told you”.

Then as I grew up, I realize that not everyone believed me and instead they put me down and laughed at me. 

There were some seasons where God told me to not tell a soul, then recently He told me it was okay to tell a few trusted souls after months of incubation. The outcome was not always what I expected. Instead, I found myself doubting the word God gave me. 

“Why would you tell me it’s okay to tell people when you KNEW it would put doubt in my heart?” – Me

“To strengthen your faith and resolve”- God

It says that “trouble and persecution comes BECAUSE of the word”. So why the heck would I want to have a word from God if trouble and persecution will come BECAUSE of that word? 

Because when THE WORD bears fruit….They hear the word, receive it, and produce a crop—thirtyfold, sixtyfold, or a hundredfold. 

When I realized that it was just the enemy trying to shake me from God’s promises for me, I quickly forgave the people who started attacking me. I realize this was just a test for me to see how unshakable my faith was in what GOD told me.

Why would God allow it?

To make sure HIS word has taken roots in my heart and that I will not be shaken when trouble, persecution, cares of this life, deceitfulness of wealth and the desire for other things comes.

He is building an unshakeable people, not a shakeable people that will walk away from His promises right when other people start attacking or putting doubts in their mind.

In Genesis, Satan asks “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat of any tree in the garden?’” (this was preached by Toure Roberts here)

He first attempts to put doubt in Adam and Eve’s mind….did God really say? 

The woman answered the serpent, “We may eat the fruit of the trees of the garden, but of the fruit of the tree in the middle of the garden, God has said, ‘You must not eat of it or touch it, or you will die.’”

“You will not surely die,” the serpent told her. “For God knows that in the day you eat of it, your eyes will be opened and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”

Then HE gives them a new word that contains a LIE in it. 

He told them a lie so that they would STEP out of the promise God had for them. When they chose to believe the lie, they acted upon the lie. 

I feel like this is not the season to have self-doubt.

God has given you a word and it is time to nurture that word and not give any opening to the enemy to abort that word.

I think that is why God often did not want me to reveal what He was doing in my life (or going to do in my life) because He knew I wouldn’t be able to withstand the accusations or opinions that came with exposure. 

I pray that you would be able to withstand the testing as your rest in the perfect grace of God. You do not need anyone’s approval to walk into the WORD GOD gave you. 

Whatever He has told you, protect it with your life.

People often abort what God is doing because they’ve exposed it too quickly and exposed themselves to attacks they cannot handle. Because of that they walk away from what God originally told them.

You do not need a pastor, mentor, friends or family to agree with what God has told you. You just need a word from God.

It’s Meant To Be Impossible For You, it’s ONLY POSSIBLE WITH GOD.

Hey everyone,

This season has been super heavy with expectation and birthing.

I woke up from a dream where I moved to a new house, but it was in New York, it was cold….I took a picture and when I did I noticed a man dressed like Santa Clause who was sitting camouflaged to the environment. He was just chilling. In the dream, I walked into the new house that had nothing in it and I wondered how my mom bought it with no money.

When I woke up, I felt the Lord speaking to me:

“It’s MEANT TO BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU but POSSIBLE FOR GOD”.

THERE ARE MAJOR DECISIONS, PROMISES BEING MANIFESTED IN THIS HOUR that HAS GOTTEN YOU FEELING WEARY AND TIRED….but it’s BECAUSE many of us are trying to make it happen with our own human strivings, flesh, strategies. 

“So he said to me, ‘This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: ‘Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,’ says the LORD Almighty.” Zechariah 4:6 

“I NEED YOU TO COME TO THE END OF YOURSELF SO THAT YOU WOULD RELY ON ME ALONE FOR THE finances, the resources, the people, the way, the strategy. STOP LOOKING AT WHAT YOU DON’T HAVE (the talent, the skill, the opportunities, the money, the friends)- LOOK AT WHO I AM, someone who gives freely and can DO ALL THINGS FOR YOU”. 

I will be glorified through your testimony of HOW I’ll part the seas for you. 

Watch this video and share this post/video with your friends:

 

It’s Time To Move Forward

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Tell my people “It’s time to move forward”.

Many people have been in a season of battle and tribulation. The enemy has attacked you with depression, frustration and weariness.

The Lord is saying “Take heart, I have overcome the world. This too shall pass”.

I prophesy that this month and onward, you are going to advance into your territory. 

I pray that all weariness will fall off of you and you will enter into a new season of rest with God. I pray that all distraction will be removed so that you can focus on what God has for you in the secret place.

It’s time to move forward. Yes, this word was spoken in the beginning of the year, but prophesies take time to walk out.

Whatever God has been speaking to you about, take it by faith and choose to trust God.

Doubts will come – “I’m not enough, I don’t have enough, I can’t”.

But God says “I am enough, I have everything and you can because I am in you”. 

Get ready, get ready, get ready.

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The Fire of Refinement

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This morning I confronted someone about the way she was talking to me.

I said it hurts me and makes me feel like she doesn’t love me. Basically when someone is mean to me, I cope by being positive and trying to recite truth and all that.

But I felt like God was saying “I want the real you, I want you to feel the emotions and not ignore them or try to be positive”. Stand up and fight this battle. 

And then I burst out crying.

It was like emotional hell, my heart couldn’t take it anymore. I was being verbally abused but I had just become numb…since it’s my mom, I thought “I just have to deal with it”.

As you know, in many Asian families emotions like sadness are a sign of weakness. We do not talk about vulnerable things like “it hurts me when you say this”.

Instead, anger is okay for some reason. Like you can be sad and just show it by yelling. Like it doesn’t make sense at all.

Then she replied “do you have depression or something?”

I turned my head and rolled my eyes….this is retarded.

At least I did my part. No apologies from her end. But it’s okay, I don’t feel like I’m dying anymore. 

I don’t feel like my heart is swallowing itself anymore. 

It’s easy to exit, escape and walk away. It’s easy to move and just not talk to that person, but I feel like in this season God wants us to face those emotional battles. 

A lot of people end up alone in life because they don’t want to face the hard emotional battles that come with love.

Love is NOT easy. 

Love is well, longsuffering. Love is patient, love is kind, love is….well 1 Corinthians 13:4

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 This season God is refining me…and perhaps you.
  1. the process of removing impurities or unwanted elements from a substance.
    IF God is love then HE IS making me MORE LIKE HIM. God is removing anything in me that is not love. This means, I must also confront the people and things in my life that is NOT treating me with love. And I must Forgive.
    Because Forgiveness will loosen my heart from the grips of the devil. 
    Love and forgiveness are fierce. They are the evidence of Christ in someone’s life. Someone who is able to forgive when they have been fiercely wronged….that is not weakness, that is FIERCE. 

    Jesus loves me with a fierce love and He is teaching me how to be this fierce love. How do I continue to love someone who constantly hurts me?

Forgiveness.

And sometimes space to recuperate and cry. And boundaries.

I pray God will give you the wisdom and strength to love, confront, to overcome hurt in your relationships.

God Closes Doors To Protect You From People Who Don’t See Your Worth

 

God closes doors and opportunities to protect you from people who don’t see your worth
This VIDEO will change your life and how you VIEW REJECTION!

I have BEEN rejected so many times in my life. In fact, my elementary and middle school years were riddled with bullying and rejection. This continued on in my life as I was different wherever I went. I didn’t realize it was because of the light in me, my refusal to compromise my values and who I am.

I hope this video will change your life and how you view rejection. I know it hurts but when you see the light shinning in you, you’ll realize, GOD LOVES ME THE WAY I AM and HE CREATED ME THIS WAY FOR A PURPOSE! 

Be grateful when God hides you. “I know you have glory on you, but I don’t want the wrong people to see it and take advantage of it. They won’t cherish you, they won’t celebrate you, they’ll scheme and misuse you!” says the Lord.

Be grateful when God hides you because He WANTS YOU TO SEE YOUR WORTH before anyone else does so that YOU WILL KNOW how to negotiate for what you are worth when the time comes….you won’t settle LOW or SELL YOURSELF SHORT for the glory that is in you. 

Be grateful when God hides you because He is waiting for the RIGHT people and opportunities to open their eyes to you so that your anointing won’t be tainted by the greed and selfishness of the wrong people. 

Www.rebekkalien.com

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A Queen/King Honors Her Emotions & Boundaries

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One of the worse things I experienced in life was having a trusted person betray me. It wasn’t that she did anything wrong, she said something really wrong. She dishonored my emotions (and me) during a time when I was going through a really hard time which was caused by one of her family members.

I had a dream where God showed me why I was feeling so shut down.

She belittled the hurt.

And I think that’s why it’s so important we allow children to cry and express anger, hurt. EMOTIONS ARE IMPORTANT. They tell us that our boundaries have been crossed. 

I didn’t think it – but subconsciously, I felt helpless. I felt that even my best friend was against me since she of course sided with her family. The people around me felt like I was being melodramatic and I didn’t know how to describe the hurt and the betrayal.

I felt alone and helpless. I felt angry and betrayed.

After that, I subconsciously shut down my emotions because people didn’t understand them anyways, because it didn’t get anything done, because the person closest to me brushed it aside.

It’s okay, I don’t need to be understood.

During that time I found my true friend, someone who really honored my emotions and could also tell me the truth.

But my heart felt cold and frosty for a long time.

That’s why when my heart suddenly started to melt, it was painful. I can feel the pain now, I can feel now.

“I was dishonored, disgraced, humiliated for your sake”- says the Lord. “I know how that feels, betrayal”. 

When I started to shut down my emotions, I started to sometimes under eat or over eat. I didn’t know when I was full or sometimes hungry. I was so detached from my emotions that I couldn’t even understand what my body was telling me.

I learned that I escaped painful emotions by eating sweets. 

I learned that I used logic and my mind to figure out what wasn’t working instead of going through experiencing the emotions. 

Yesterday this mentally unstable lady on the street demanded I give her my water and I did, at first out of good will, but then got angry at her for taking my water because I was really thirsty.

I forgave her in my heart but decided not to randomly give my water away. She could have gone to in and out to get water. I turned around and saw she had dumped the water on a bench. Next time I will speak loudly for myself. No.

I’ve been watching “The Return of Superman”, a Korean show about dads raising their kids and what I started noticing is that kids are raised to share because it’s a “kind thing to do”.

But kids are rarely taught boundaries.

I was not taught boundaries. I felt like things were easily taken from me, things I loved. In this way, I did not know how to protect and keep things I loved. I allowed people to step over me and didn’t know how to speak up for myself because this was illustrated to me in my family.

I was even taught this in church. Sacrifice.

But no one taught me that because Jesus already became the sacrifice that I didn’t need to be the sacrifice in my life. I didn’t need to be crucified everyday. 

I don’t think martyrdom is what Jesus wanted.

I think He wanted us to know what He died for us to have, to be, to live. 

I think we are in an age where we need to know who we are and push back the darkness that surrounds us. We can’t just take it. That’s not okay. 

We need to stand up and speak up. We need to rise and protect our boundaries.

People tell me that I’m so bold and self-loving. 

But that wasn’t always the case. I was the quiet, obedient Asian girl that people expected me to be. Now when I shout, the whole building can hear me. 

It’s because I know who I am and what I deserve now.

A queen seated on high.