You encounter such bad love your whole life that you don’t know what good love is.
And you finally open up, you want to be an open book but those around you want to shut down. You want to be loved and accepted for all of you, not just a part of you. So you share, but you feel judged.
But now, you’ve reached a new level.
It’s a healthy love.
They will embrace and love you even if your emotions are messy, even if you try to run, they run after you, they won’t let you hide, they’ll uncover the blanket hiding all your mess. They see the mess and they love you, they let you cry on their shoulder.
That’s what I’m experiencing now.
You can come to a point that you communicate everything on your mind, and it feels amazing.
You don’t have to run from the people that want to love you, you run into their arms.
Even if that person is simply a friend, not your husband.
You don’t need to keep or own a person, you can love and express love without judgement or rejection.
I realize why I felt the need to socialize and minister to people when I was with my friend. There was a block. There were friends that didn’t really allow themselves to emote, or to feel their emotions. I’d want to talk to other people to feel my emotions.
I’m seeing old cycles broken in my life.
Cycles where I used sexuality to feel my emotions, cycles where I ran to distractions and temporary pleasures to gratify the numbness.
I’m finally feeling all of my emotions, I’m accepting them.
I can talk about all my emotions and not be afraid to feel them. I dated an ex that never talked about his emotions, it was impossible to connect with him. Because of that, I ended up cheating on him.
I felt like I was not allowed to have “negative” emotions and whenever I talked about how I felt, he would shut me down and tell me not to talk about it. He had panic attacks, he had anxiety, he never cried. He only cried when we broke up.
I felt alone in that relationship.
I felt utterly alone and unloved because my emotions were not accepted or valued.
Now, I know what love is supposed to feel like.
I’m supposed to be able to run to the people I love for love, not run away from them to feel my emotions. All of my feelings and emotions should be valued and validated in a relationship, not just the positive ones.
I should be able to feel scared, sad or angry in a relationship. I should be able to be upset. I should be able to feel however I feel whenever I feel them and be heard and understood in that relationship. And even if that person does not understand, they can express that they aren’t able to understand it but they’ll try.
Communication is everything. Let’s communicate to each other, let’s dialogue instead of dictate.
Give to this ministry and prophetic word- Thank you! God bless!
I was texting friends and telling them how I felt about love versus lust. The last couple of months I’ve talked to people about waiting until marriage to have sex. I wish more people talked about sexuality and sex. I wish more people realized how damaging sex really can be outside of love.
Even as a virgin, I experienced sexual and physical experiences.
As a spiritual being, I started to become even more aware when I would hear “unclean spirits”. Even if I wanted to ignore it my spiritual senses became heightened. I felt unclean, not because of what I was doing but because of the spirits that were attached the person I was with.
So I could say “God I just want to enjoy myself” but now I realize there is something impure in lust. You are righteous in Christ Jesus, but there is something damaging to the soul when you are being used for physical pleasure versus connecting out of love.
The more spiritual you become, growing in sensitivity to God, the more you sense what spirit people are operating out of.
A spirit of lust basically takes over you.
If you notice kissing someone, and all of a sudden your vagina/penis kicks in and at a certain moment, you no longer feel like you have control over your mind or emotions. Endorphins are being released but something spiritual is also happening.
Love and lust are very different things.
Love causes you to reach out, love causes you to express how you feel, love endures, it doesn’t give up.
Lust gives up, lust is momentary.
Love makes you feel safe.
Lust is corrupt, it doesn’t make you feel safe. It feels good in the moment but later you feel used, it’s unclean. I have felt it before.
Love doesn’t leave you stranded, love communicates.
Lust ghosts.
Love wants to understand and listen to you.
Lust simply wants to get in your pants. Lust has no desire to communicate clearly, it overtakes you and has no desire to understand your emotions. It’s a USER! Lust only has one agenda- sex. Lust uses for momentary pleasure and has no commitment.
Love makes you feel like a queen, but lust makes you feel like a whore.
God is mending and healing your sexual wounds. He says that you are MORE THAN YOUR BODY. You are a temple. When you’ve been filled with the Holy Spirit, you start to become even more sensitive to His heart for you.
God is doing something new for you.
He is renewing your heart. He is redeeming you from the past.
God, I just cut off the past, negative cycles I cut it off in Jesus name!
I break and loose any soul ties that are not from you in Jesus name and call back any remnants of our soul in Jesus name.
Is that person going to stay with you and make you feel like a queen? Is he willing to sacrifice himself for you?
Is he calling you and asking you about your day? Is he concerned about your welfare? Is he asking you about how you feel? Is he concerned for your safety and checks in on you? Does he tell you that he loves you?
Or is he simply using you for a momentary release?
Sow a seed to this ministry and this prophetic word-
This is a young man I ministered to and bumped into again on the train. The Lord told me to go to the beach and this man was also going there, but he was going to a shelter to shower because he did not feel safe to go home to a military christian home where there were many rules. I asked if he ever talked to his parents about how he felt and he said no, usually he just isolates himself. I said that he was worthy of love and he thanked me. I find that many young people turn to drugs because they feel condemned and not enough because of their parents’ rules and regulations. They need to know they are loved and not condemned.
I told my mom yesterday….a relationship isn’t about rules but communicating how you feel.
I was emotionally constipated for 4 days. It is rare for me not to cry everyday recently. Even when I pray sometimes I start crying.
But I couldn’t cry.
My mom was yelling at me and telling me I was crazy, she didn’t believe I was hearing God and she told me I needed to see a psychiatrist or a doctor.
I asked her “is this my water bottle?”
She said “how would I know? I never drink from water bottles!” She yelled. She starts yelling and I have no idea why. She’s probably stressed about something else but I have no idea what. She won’t talk about her emotions or feelings so I get the end of that.
I feel like the walking dead, I feel like a zombie. I don’t understand how a mother can be like that.
I feel dead inside, and suddenly I hear “I want to die”. I start casting out a spirit of death. I need to get out the house.
I get in the car and drive. I call my friend and ask her to encourage me. She says “God loves you, you are beautiful, people love you” and that’s when I break down in tears after 4 days.
I felt unwanted, that’s why. Everything I did or didn’t do was wrong to my mom. I felt like I was not enough and wasn’t doing enough.
I remember “yes I’m doing enough and I am enough”.
I said through my tears “when she yells at me I feel unwanted and unloved”.
Again, I had a dream about a phone being lost or broken, it usually has to do with communication. So I wake up with this feeling in my heart.
God tells me to tell her how I feel and I do, but it’s met with the same response of blame or shame.
She wants to hide from her emotions, she wants to run and not feel and the best way for her to do that is to stay busy. Yet her knees hurt.
So when will you stop running and just feel the emotions?
God loves you, He will never leave nor forsake you.
I grew up feeling blamed and shunned for problems that were not my own so I would people please or mommy please because I thought it was my fault that they were angry, not realizing it had nothing to do with me.
It’s taken a long journey of learning to speak my mind even when it doesn’t feel safe.
You are safe with me, says God.
Come to me and cast your cares on me. You are safe here with me.
I want a guy who asks me how my day was? What my hopes and dreams are? How am I feeling?
A man, not a boy. A man who cares about me, not just his ego. A man who wants to take care of me, make me feel loved. He is not egotistical, self-centered. He is able to be vulnerable and emotional. He is in touch with his emotions and know what he is feeling. He can feel his heart.
“How are you doing?” not just “what did you eat for dinner?”
And he listens, not just talks.
So many guys talk, they go on long monologues about things I’m not interested in. I want a guy to say “I love you, and you’re the only one I want to be with”. I’m the only love interest in his life, not another girl, another pretty face.
He sees my value and my worth. He sees that I am more than anything he owns on this earth, more than gold or dollar signs.
He is willing to die for me and show that he cares, by listening, by talking, by conversing. He puts emotional connection first, not physical connection. Because without emotional connection, nothing else matters.
I want a man, not a boy. A man is not afraid of tears, he is in touch with his emotions even if he seems weak in peoples’ eyes. His vulnerability is his strength, he is willing to admit when he is sad or angry. He is willing to admit he feels jealous. But he won’t control, he will communicate his fears.
Are you willing to be vulnerable enough to admit that –
You’re scared
You miss someone
You don’t want to seem like a fool but here’s all of your emotions
You’re insecure
Be honest and tell someone how you actually feel
Over the last few months God has taught me so much about what I want and how to be honest with people I meet, at any cost. This means that I have told my truth even though it may have hurt someone.
I want to be –
Understood
Heard
Cared for
I have met plenty of self- centered men that only like me for my beauty or for how I make them feel.
The truth is – they should be interested in your dreams too, they should support you in what you want to do.
A man who supports your dreams should ask you this-
How can I help?
How do you need to be loved?
How can I make you feel secure?
and they communicate their emotions to you. They don’t run away from confrontation, they meet you half way. They show up.
When I was young, I was taught that God will just bring your husband.
You just had to sit there and wait.
LOL.
But what God has taught me in the last few years is that when you have triggers and issues related to men (for me) since I did not grow up with my dad and had many fears about marriage— God will graciously bring what you need to heal those wounds.
God has brought me many divine appointments to show me that there are good men out there. He has taught me how to communicate and relate to a male. He has shown me why some males have trouble communicating their emotions and what they struggle with.
Here were my fears –
That someone will disappear and walk away (a fear of loss).
I felt that people didn’t care about me, and instead of conveying how they felt….they disappeared (again).
That if I got emotionally close to someone and it was a male, they had to be my future husband….because if I got close to someone who wasn’t my husband then well, they’d end up liking me or vice versa…and that was ultimately bad…since you would have to separate from each other. So better not to take the chance. And also because I had a close guy friend that I thought liked me, but ultimately got a girlfriend (so I read the cues wrong but God protected me).
What I have learned to do in the last years-
Tell a guy if I liked him or was attracted to him. Be vulnerable and tell him how I felt even if he did not like me back. This has helped me to overcome any fear of rejection.
Tell a guy if he was not my future husband and brace the reactions, even if it was bad.
Tell the truth at all times.
So I think churches don’t teach that stuff at all.
Churches teach “avoid” at all costs. They don’t teach honesty. They don’t teach people how to confront issues and bring up the issue. What I learned from church was “just avoid dating. Only date the guy if he’s going to be your husband”.
Dating is really about getting to know a person. If after a date, or a coffee date….he is not what you’re looking for, it’s okay to tell the truth and move on! Perhaps a lot of people are scared to date because they’re scared of rejection or getting their heart broken.
Dating isn’t about avoiding the truth, it’s about telling the truth! Some people are scared to date because they’re scared to hurt someone….so they just disappear or ghost and there are a lot of unresolved issues because of that.
I’ve seen that the more honest and direct you are, the better.
Some people settle because they think “this is good enough”.
But you deserve the BEST!
So why not put yourself out there. It’s not about getting it right. It’s about living in freedom and expressing love.
I have told plenty of people that they are attractive or that they are kind and loving. I have told people that they are amazing. Why not? And I’ve been vulnerable too, and I’ve been hurt. But why live with fear?
Hey guys, for some reason the previous message got erased when I put this facebook link in so I guess God just wants that video in here.
From a divine appointment-
He kept saying “but you know that’s reality”
I said “faith is believing what God said and resting in it”. Rest in what God said.
So you can keep striving to work things out in your flesh, or you can trust that God already finished it for you and LIVE according to what He said.
Prophetic Word-
Don’t be so distracted by your reality that you think the pain is all there is.
Maybe God is healing past traumas and you’re overwhelmed by the pain, but YOU’RE NOT GOING TO STAY THERE! DECREE that the mountain be removed, the discouragement be REMOVED. GOD HAS A GREAT FUTURE FOR YOU. DWELL IN HIS LOVE.
Prophetic WORD- URGENT, IT’s NOT TIME TO QUESTION GOD, IT’S TIME TO ACT IN FAITH. THERE IS ACCELERATION FOR THOSE WHO OBEY AND MOVE/OBEY WITHOUT DOUBT.
There is a BREAKTHROUGH for those who are WILLING TO ACT UPON WHAT GOD IS SAYING AT ALL TIMES. Sure God will never condemn you for NOT OBEYING but the reason HE TELLS YOU TO DO SOMETHING is because the enemy has launched an assault of FEAR, FEAR OF LACK, CONDEMNATION AGAINST YOU so that you will stay small, so you would LIVE IN FEAR.
GOD HAS GIVEN YOU INSTRUCTIONS BECAUSE HE WANTS YOU TO BREAK OUT OF FEAR, these ACTIONS will ACTUALLY CATAPULT YOU FORWARD.
Last night I had a dream and I was going somewhere but I kept thinking is this wrong or right? But I finally GOT THERE because I PUSHED THROUGH and OBEYED.
And I realize it was a spirit of condemnation and FEAR. Yesterday a lady GAVE and she told me the LORD had told her to give several times but she had excuses. THE LORD did not ASK HER TO GIVE TO TORTURE HER, the LORD ACTUALLY HAS A BREAKTHROUGH OUT OF FEAR (FEAR OF LACK) for her.
THE ENEMY HAS LAUNCHED AN ASSAULT TO KILL YOUR BREAKTHROUGH AND DESTINY by SELF- DOUBT, PLAYING SMALL, DOING WHAT FEELS SAFE.
WHY? The Lord KEPT ASKING ME TO ASK PEOPLE FOR DONATIONS AS I KEPT HEARING NO’S or was being ignored. I TOLD GOD I WAS REALLY TIRED of asking and HE SAID DON’T GIVE UP.
He showed me that THERE IS A BONDAGE OF FEAR right now and I am not to give into it. There was also a spirit of condemnation to make me feel like I did something wrong. And I thought, maybe I should just “rest” and let GOD do IT.
But HE SHOWED ME “THAT IS FEAR SPEAKING”.
YOU WILL NEED TO PUSH THROUGH THE FEAR. Whatever fear it is right now, THERE IS AN ACCELERATION RIGHT NOW INTO WHAT GOD HAS CALLED YOU TO if you are WILLING TO ACT ON WHAT HE IS SAYING and to FOLLOW YOUR HEART.
(to not use your head, logic, or “right” or “wrong” which is a spirit of legalism).
YES HE WILL QUADRUPLE your ACTS OF FAITH RIGHT NOW.
BECAUSE WE ARE LAUNCHING INTO 2020 FIERCELY. The enemy has been trying everything TO MAKE ME BACK DOWN.
The LORD TOLD ME TO WRITE MY TESTIMONY and to ASK PEOPLE FOR DONATIONS, but I STARTED TO FEEL FEAR as PEOPLE KEPT SAYING NO and IT WAS going REALLY slow.
THE ENEMY STOLE MY PHONE, it a spirit of lack attacking me.
WHENEVER THERE IS DRYNESS, there is BREAKTHROUGH ON THE OTHER SIDE OF NOT GIVING UP.
So if FEAR KEEPS TELLING YOU not to do something, you feel it in YOUR HEART, it’s PROBABLY GOD SAYING “DO IT!”
The enemy keeps trying to put me in a corner because He knows giving will cause people to have breakthrough in their lives. TODAY IS THE DAY TO GIVE IF YOU FEEL THE LORD SPEAKING. I AM NOT MANIPULATING YOU (some of you have said, I am a prophet and I hear the Lord speaking about PUSHING THROUGH DOUBT).
Many of you have been afraid to let go of the things God has told you to let go of because OF FEAR, that is a spirit of LACK.
Many of you have been doing the “right” thing but it’s NOT THE GOD THING.
THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO SIT BACK and LIVE IN COMFORT, GOD IS CALLING HIS PEOPLE TO PUSH as the baby is CROWNING. THERE IS ACCELERATION HAPPENING IN THE SPIRIT RIGHT NOW.
People have told me they feel like the church is a business, they just ask for money. The enemy wants people to think that they are being robbed but the enemy KNOWS THERE IS BREAKTHROUGH IN GIVING SO HE PUTS LIES IN PEOPLES’ HEADS SO THEY KEEP LIVING IN A MENTALITY AND SPIRIT OF LACK…VERSUS THE SPIRIT OF ABUNDANCE WHICH IS NOT AFRAID OF ANYTHING!
THIS IS ABUNDANCE- NOT GIVING UP, NOT BACKING DOWN. ABUNDANCE IS YOUR IDENTITY. ABUNDANCE IS BEING A CHILD OF GOD. Abundance is knowing the Lord is your shepherd, not mammon. The enemy keeps you small and in fear when you rely on what you have, versus what God said. Live in FAITH, not by sight.
Many of YOU ARE LOOKING AT THE LITTLE YOU HAVE INSTEAD OF LOOKING FORWARD TO WHAT GOD SAID. The enemy knows that if you just stay in the comfort zone of what you have, and thinking that’s it, you will never walk forward.
BECAUSE TO POSSESS WHAT GOD HAS TOLD YOU, YOU NEED TO WALK IN FAITH. I did not start a ministry with all the money I needed to accomplish what He told me. I only went one step at a time (sometimes one day at a time). I had no money saved. God gave me the instructions I needed to attain the PROVISION so I could reach the lost sheep and people for Him. Sometimes it did come anonymously but I had to LEARN TO ASK. I also GAVE when I felt led.
ASKING IS A STEP OF FAITH and the FEAR will HIT YOU.
People’s judgement DID HIT ME.
BUT it was the enemy trying to make me BACK DOWN. BECAUSE HE KNEW I WAS TAKING TERRITORY, lives were BEING SET FREE AND PEOPLE WERE COMING TO JESUS. If HE COULD ROB ME of the finances I needed to continue, I’d give up or be fearful of continuing. He has tried REALLY HARD. In fact, most of the persecution I’ve received from people were about fundraising.
God told me it is because HE IS EXPOSING people’s hearts. He is also removing the shame and lies the enemy has spoken to people.
WHAT KIND OF LIFE DO YOU WANT TO LIVE? THE TYPE THAT GIVES INTO FEAR OR THAT SAYS “GOD YOU SAID!” and I BELIEVE.
DOUBT WILL KILL YOUR DREAMS RIGHT NOW. Yesterday I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go dance, I drove and kept getting off the freeway. I was asking “what should I do?” instead of just doing it. I felt doubt because last time my phone got stolen. It was fear speaking. In addition, because of that my mother started worrying that
BUT that’s exactly what the enemy wants, for me to HAVE A FEAR OF LACK, that I will lose something again. THERE IS BREAKTHROUGH RIGHT NOW IN CONTINUOUS ACTS OF FAITH. The enemy is TRYING TO ABORT the baby that is coming out. It’s half way out but YOU HAVE TO PUSH.
Don’t STAY IN THE SLUMBER OF THE ENEMY. Many people are not hoping and trusting in God, but what they have. They are making plans according to their budget. But if you want to launch into God’s plans, YOU HAVE TO LET GO OF CONTROL (finances, plans, people, etc) AND BELIEVE GOD.
I had another dream where I was changing bathing suits but the suit was confusing so it took me forever. The swimming pool was closing, so I had to hurry. Some guy saved me as the POOL was extremely wavy.
YOU ARE A CHILD OF GOD RIGHT NOW. YOU ARE RIGHTEOUS RIGHT NOW. YOU ARE ABUNDANT RIGHT NOW.
Don’t let the fear prevent you from your launching in acceleration.
IF GOD HAS BEEN SPEAKING TO YOU TO GIVE, TO DO SOMETHING, PLEASE DO NOT WAVER RIGHT NOW. HE SAID THAT FEAR OF LACK will ATTRACT LACK, but if you act upon what God is saying, it will BREAK OFF THE FEAR.
Give – “Not that I desire your gifts; what I desire is that more be credited to your account” Philippians 4:17
There is A LOT OF CRYING in this video. Why am I making this public? Because I believe SOMEONE needs to watch it. If someone can have a revelation or can come out of emotional hiding because of my vulnerability, then I’ve done my job. I love you guys.
This is a really vulnerable confession to my dad about how I feel. When I was 8 years old my mom and dad divorced and I did not see my dad for 10 years. I immigrated to America when I was 8 years old with my mother. After the 10 years I see him every 3 plus years and every time it’s like connecting with an emotionally unavailable human being that doesn’t tell his truth or disappears physically for a few days without telling me where he is.
I received Jesus when I was 12 but have had a lot of unhealed parts of my heart. I am 31 years now and God is still healing me from an absent father, abandonment issues and feeling unwanted/rejected.
I’ve been visiting the abbey, which is a gay club. The Lord has told me He has given me West Hollywood as a spiritual territory. I used to tell people even though I’m straight, I feel like a gay guy. I felt a connection with them but I couldn’t explain it until recently. I understand the pain of being rejected for being different. Of course not everyone of them lack a father figure, but I believe there are deep roots of feeling rejected.
I see hundreds of gay guys there and the first word I hear is “rejection”. I love them with a pain in my heart, because I know many of them are longing for acceptance and love from a father figure. God loves you dearly, unconditionally.
Sow a Seed (make a donation)- thank you and blessings towards you.
Whenever we make SOMETHING, SOMEONE a “need”, we are living out of a spirit of lack, we don’t believe we are enough RIGHT NOW.
1. Witchcraft stems from fear, which makes you try to control the future through any means (holding onto what you can control, holding onto things God told you to let go, trying to make things happen in your flesh, holding onto a past word and not being present).
2. When we are afraid to take risks, it’s because we are afraid to let go of control, it stems from fear.
3. Relationship with God vs. Witchcraft (trying to make things happen through your flesh)
YOU’RE A CHILD OF GOD, YOU ARE SPECIAL IN MY EYES! YOU ARE ENOUGH AND NOT LACKING!