When Serving Becomes Our Identity, Instead Simply Being a Child Of God

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I feel we are in a season of coming back to Jesus to get our self-worth, versus basing it on how we serve Him.

I just had a dream for my brother in Christ and I told him that he needed to slow down and spend time with Jesus and he said that I was right as he has traveled the last 2 months ministering to people, healing the sick, etc but that he was worn down and tired.

Sometimes in ministry we start to believe a few lies that I want to dismantle today-

Lie 1- Your identity comes from how many people you help.

Truth- Your identity comes from being a child of God, who God so loved that He sent His only child (Jesus) to be sacrificed for you.

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. 1 John 3:1-2 

Lie 2- God will only bless you if you obey.

Truth – Jesus paid the price on the cross for your blessings. His work was perfect obedience to the Father and even if you don’t perfectly obey, He does not punish you for it. I want to reiterate that He wants us to live in freedom, not paranoia. Our hearts should only “do things” out of DESIRE, not duty. 

Obedience comes from the overflow of the knowledge that He loves you, not because IF YOU DON’T OBEY that He will take away what He wants to bless you with.

That is living under the law. When we live under the law of condemnation and punishment, working for our blessings, we will not receive it- why? Because it will always be conditioned on how much we serve and do, versus from the perfect knowledge that we are loved by God no matter what.

This reminds of the prodigal son story. The older brother worked in bitterness thinking he had to earn his father’s blessings versus the prodigal son who experienced God’s blessings by doing what he wanted to – then realizing that his ways were not working and ended up running back to his father. 

God wants to have a genuine relationship with you, not one that is forced or led by duty and obligation.

But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

When Jesus said it is finished, it is finished.

Lie 3- You need to sacrifice yourself when you are a Christian

Truth- God wants you to know that you are worthy, you are worthy of love and a good life. 

People who constantly sacrifice themselves for others believe that they are not worthy unless they are bringing something to the table. I’ve met people who say they do a lot for others because they want to show others that they are worthy….but people shouldn’t love or bless you because of what you do for them but who you are.

You don’t owe anything to anyone. You paid by being born. 

You don’t tell a baby that “one day you will pay by buying me a house” (Asian parents). You are a gift from heaven and you are a delight.

You are worthy of love just because you exist. 

God has grand purposes and destinies for you but He wants you to live out of a deep place of intimate love with Him. He wants you to know you are loved beyond comprehension first and foremost. If we serve or help others out of any other agenda (such as to prove that we are worthy to receive His blessings), then we are not living out of true grace. 

I’m not sure at what point I started to believe that I just needed to do more on this journey, but towards the end I was starting to wane in my passion. I was not being fed in my heart. I realize that I need a lot of alone time and I wasn’t getting it. When you are constantly serving others their voices start to muffle your own thoughts and desires. I’m grateful for the revelations God has been giving me in these few days. 

I pray today God would break off the slavery mentality and orphan mentality that ties you to “obligation”. You need to know that He loves you to the moon and back.

And HIS PROMISES FOR YOU ARE YES AND AMEN! AND YOU DON’T HAVE TO SACRIFICE YOURSELF TO HAVE WHAT YOU WANT AS HE ALREADY BECAME THE PERFECT SACRIFICE ON YOUR BEHALF.

May you live completely from a place of knowing you are LOVED by God, and that your life will be driven by LOVE not FEAR. His love for you is not dependent on what you do for Him, His love for you is complete and finished. He does not look at your “disobedience” as He does not see blemish in you- He only sees Jesus in you (who obeyed perfectly onto the cross). 

I pray for the ministers and servants out there that you will not be confused by the enemy who tries to tell you that your worth comes from how much you help or don’t help others. That is a form of condemnation and accusation! I break off the spirit of python that tries to choke the life out of your heart and dreams in Jesus name! I break off false responsibility in Jesus name!

Our lives should never be driven by “I SHOULD”- your life should be driven by “I WANT”.

Sow-

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Princess “Love” Diaries

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I wrote a lot today but after watching “Late Night”, I was even more inspired to write truthfully. Mindy has a way of inspiring me. She is not white, she is in fact ASIAN! It’s good to see a fellow Asian writing movies.

SO I named this blog post Princess Diaries because unlike the princess in many stories, I have been the prince in my own life for my whole life. Jesus was my prince sure, but I was very masculine growing up, I had to be my own bread winner, to support myself since I was very young. Even if I didn’t really want to, something inside of me said that I must “DO DO DO” and I never understood the laid back life. It was only until I understood grace that I learned to rest….but then God took me on a journey last year that seriously wore me out. I LOST all my strength and even my desires.

I AM A PRINCESS and I want to live like one. I don’t think that’s too much to ask for. What I mean is so many women have fought for rights and I get that, but for once I’d like someone to take care of me. I get that I’m a pioneer but I can’t go on any longer forging a new path, for once I like 100 people behind me saying “YOU CAN DO IT!”

I’m tired of praying in tongues trying to encourage myself is what I’m saying. I’m not alone. I have gathered women on my journey who have contended and prayed for me and I AM SO GRATEFUL.

But I’m asking God now “OKAY I’m ready for my prince!” Like the real life one.

I think sometimes singles look at married couple and think “how did he/she get that husband/wife, are they more qualified than I” as if it’s a job that you need to be qualified for…and when you’re following Jesus and you’ve sacrificed

You wonder “why did they find each other” when she didn’t really do anything as if husband/wives are like rewards you get for following Jesus.

And then when the life partner takes a freaken long time to come you think “what did I do wrong?”

Well good news- it’s not something you earn.

Because a life partner is a gift, like anything else good in this life, not something you earn by your works.

And my advice is, just don’t settle. Wait for the right person. Everyone has their own life story and no one has the same timeline. Sometimes when you’ve waited a long time for some of God’s promises to come to pass in your life, you feel forgotten…you think, what the hell God. Serious? 

Where did I get it wrong?

Did I waste too much time with my ex? DO I need to dye my hair? Cut my hair? DO I need to go on tinder like everyone else? Do I need to go on dates with people I’m only 10% interested in?

And my answer is….no.

You are enough.

I know it sounds so simple, but you’re not lacking anything and when you journey through life, YOUR LIFE PARTNER WILL COME. Period. 

Don’t wait for those “things” and “people” to come. LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE NOW.

A year ago when I was in LA, I watched over 70 movies in 7 months by myself (save 2 that I watched with a girl I met at the gym and 1 where I divinely sat next to her the whole movie….and at the end she called my name)- btw I had moviepass. LOL.

I LOVE movies and I want to write and direct them.

Here’s the thing, I didn’t wait for a date to watch these movies, I just followed my heart. Don’t ever wait for others to get it or to come along your adventures, most people are too slow and too scared to do it. 

It is coming- whatever you have dreamed of. Don’t give up hope just because you don’t see it now. I know that waiting seems indefinite but I always tell people, “well you are only single for the first part ish of your life” (for the youngans I’m talking to), then you are married for the rest of your life. So, what do you want to do now?

I want you to start dreaming again. I know many things died in your life- perhaps a dream, a person, a career….but what would it look like if your life was a phoenix rising up to the skies? 

I’ve only started dreaming again. I’ve had so many disappointments that I’ve stopped dreaming and even in the midst of ministry, I felt my heart was neglected somehow. I feel like this is the season to receive everything I’ve sown into others.

May the deaths in your vision resurrect. May your heart pound again and may you have butterflies again. May you laugh with excitement and jump up and down due to glee. May your eyes light up with hope and joy. May the flowers that you pass by in dark seasons become vivid yellows and blues. May your words and colors flow again. May you paint with renewed passion. May you conduct and produce all that the creator put in you. May you receive everything you’ve been yearning for. May you have people that you call home, who support you and create a safe place for your heart.

You won’t have to prove yourself in this season. 

It’s too tiring. No. This season, you won’t have to explain yourself. This season, it will be filled with ease. This season, you will receive an award for being you. This season you won’t pretend to be happy when you’re not and sad when you’re not. This season you will smile with authenticity and you will only allow the genuine ones into your life.

There was too much deception and manipulation in the last season, too many wolves in sheep skin, too many deceptive spirits and too many falls into dark caves.

This season you will soar and it will be easy. 

I declare this over you. It will be an easy season, where you will naturally reap everything Jesus paid for you to have. 

I readily submit myself to this plan. For now I have nothing to lose.

In Jesus name amen.

Journey with me on this path of recovering your heart and dreams friend- sow a seed: thank you!

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Walk In The Unknown

I moved a lot growing up so I was constantly walking into the unknown. Not by choice though. Me in Germany.

Most of our society walks in the known. The known is comfortable, safe, without unknowns but God constantly pushes us to trust Him to walk with Him in the unknowns.

So that’s where though we think we are “resting” often we are submitting to fear. It’s sounds strange because of course some people seriously need to rest but most people sit in front of the television as the world passes by.

Watching tv is not resting. Yes, there are seasons of that but even in this season I feel wary thinking about the future.

I’m back in LA but heading out June 24.

I’m not sure what to expect and to be honest I’m a little traumatized by everything I went through this year ministering on the road. I’m not sure if I ever want to experience it again yet I know God is calling me to a higher level of faith.

I kind of hate that He has called me to this life.

I keep telling Him “I can’t do it”.

I can’t go on anymore.

I feel numb.

And that’s my heart wanting to be comfortable, to succumb to fear.

Jesus- You can do anything you set your mind to.

Well what if I don’t want to? What if I want to live a boring life?

Jesus- then you’ll be bored.

Okay then.

God I kind of don’t want to trust you.

Jesus- you’re not an orphan, you’re a child of God.

Me- but I went through a lot of things I didn’t really want to go through.

Jesus- but you got through it.

Me- but I have bad memories from it and I’m mentally trying to protect myself from future instances of a) being severely accused of or rejected by people I minister to b) having to be on the streets and having to ask judgmental people for help c) the list goes on.

Jesus- you are enough.

Don’t settle for the past or even think about the past. Move forward.

Me- My body and psyche can’t seem to move forward.

Jesus- let go and focus on me. Let go of every hindering memory and focus on me. Focus on my goodness. The enemy wants you to focus on the bad experiences. I am a good father – do you trust me?

Me- no not right now. But I’m still following you- I just don’t feel the joy.

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

2 Corinthians 4:8

This is my process. I know it’s been a hard week for some of you and in the battle it’s easy to lose joy so I pray right now God will bring back joy into your heart and if you need to cry- cry. I pray encouragement over your hearts.

I will be heading to Taiwan then China. I’m not sure what God has in store but I know most missionaries are getting kicked out of China so it helps that I’m independent in the sense that I’m just going where the spirit leads instead of being stationed like most missionaries.

I am now raising funds for what’s ahead. Flight tickets and living fees. Would you consider partnering with me in bringing Christ to the world?

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Where Is Home? Finding Stability in The Chaos

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I decided to write because I started sobbing. Why I was sobbing…Let me explain.

I just got back to LA but instead of the normal LA life, I found myself being called by God to minister everyday. I was pushed and forced out of my comfort zone (in LA). One day I was going 40 miles out on a bus, another day I’m traveling. I’ve been spending almost 4 hours on public transportation everyday. God has led me to the people He wanted me to relay messages to.

Like today I got to meet a father and son in the wee early morning. I felt so at home with them. My heart felt alive. 

The reason I was even going to Calabasas was because I saw an audition to be a rainbow hair model. I really want rainbow hair. However, I didn’t like the idea of waking up early but I felt that God wanted me to go.

So the night before I said “God if you want me to go, then wake me up”. I didn’t set an alarm.

At 4:30 am God woke me up with a revelation and I blogged about it (the previous post). At 5:30 am I decided to go back to sleep…however God said “wake up, go now!”

I was like “fine”. I took a bus around 6:15 am and when I got to Downtown I was at the bus stop when a man and his son asked me if the bus stopped there, I said yes. Immediately I felt a connection. God said to sit next to him so we talked the whole way. He showed me the book he wrote and published on amazon. He said he directed films and his son (8 years old) said he wanted to make money and he found an audition for him.

We happened to be going to the same studio.

Strangely, I said I started making money when I was 8 years old too, selling toys after school. I said usually the reason kids want to make money is because they feel insecure, like I did at the time. I saw my mother struggling and I wanted to help by being independent at a young age.

God has a strange way of connecting us to people with similar experiences. Then he told me how he drove a bus and sold t-shirts out of it, he traveled throughout the US. I prayed over him and said that in God’s eyes he is not lacking and that he needed to speak his truth without fear of what others thought of him. He told me how he was adopted but that aristocrats and celebrities always gravitate towards him because of his authenticity.

I really loved meeting them and enjoyed spending time with them.

After I arrived 2 hours early, I waited around for my audition. God kept telling me that I would be the only one and sure enough I was the only one that showed up for the audition. However, because of my hair length I was not picked.

I felt like a failure for some reason…maybe it was the way the lady asked for more photos of me saying “I need to see what you look like” while she was obviously standing in front of me…LIKE HELLO CAN’T YOU SEE WHAT I LOOK LIKE?

My mind raced- “she must be racist, she must not think I’m pretty enough, is it because of my growing lower chin, is it because I have no makeup on?”

I felt so depleted and disappointed…”I thought you said I would get picked!” I said to God. No answer. But deep down I knew that God was somehow protecting me. It was just an off-spirit about that place.

At first I sat in one place hoping she’d change her mind. I just really wanted rainbow hair. I don’t know why. Maybe rainbows represent promises fulfilled and maybe I felt like I hadn’t seen that many promises fulfilled. Sure I’ve ministered in 14 countries in the last year and have seen OTHER PEOPLES’ promises fulfilled, but for some reason I felt that I was STILL waiting for mine to be fulfilled. 

So I thought “I was the only one, I had no competition, yet I still didn’t get what I want?” That’s how I felt. The lady had to tell me “you’re free to go” before I could get myself up.

I went to the bathroom and started crying. 

I was disappointed. I was tired. It felt like my life, and I know it was the enemy of course...but I was just tired of being disappointed you know? Whether it came to a potential suitor not ending up being my future husband, the relationship not working out….or feeling like I had a home and then going back to LA and being accused by my mother instead of celebrated. 

My heart felt really tired.

Again? It felt.

Then I nodded off in the bus heading back to Downtown. I saw a lot of drunk people, high people on the bus. I smelled weed, I saw drunk people hitting on women. This is LA, but it felt foreign. “It’s gotten worse” I thought as I sat in the crowded Orange Line Bus to North Hollywood.

It occurred to me….”Hollywood is full of orphans looking for approval”. 

The guy with a guitar strapped to his heart in the bus.

A guy with golden chains around his neck while he spoke to his friend on the phone, “everyone who is anyone is out in Hollywood trying to make it”.

God said “well you are my daughter and you don’t need anyone’s approval”. That’s when God really set me free because a part of my heart was still hoping to make it in Hollywood (to share the light of Jesus). I thought I needed to appear in movies and tv shows to be influential but God was saying “I don’t need that, I don’t need a network, I don’t need a tv channel, I will do it my way through you”. 

You don’t need whoever you think you need.

I think that’s why people end up bowing down to people versus God. They think they need the job, the paycheck, the husband, the abuser, the relationship, the friend….but you don’t need anyone or anything but God. Because whoever you are codependent on usually begin to abuse or lord over you. That’s what I talked about in my last post, Sarah versus Hagar

So everything seemed to be piling up. In addition, after just coming back to LA, living a life of ministry on the road, I’m still doing ministry here. Then God says “it’s time to go” again. I leave LA June 24. I just follow His spirit everyday. My flesh is screaming, I don’t want to!!! I want to live a normal life!! But my spirit is like “YES, take me!” 

Because of the hardships and challenges I’ve gone through this year coming back actually feels like coming off the battlefield in the army.

I feel like a soldier coming back to civilian life, yet…still on the battlefield spiritually. I haven’t seen any of my friends yet….yet everything feels different. Recently I’ve been waking up in the middle of the night from music in the air. I don’t know where the music is coming from but maybe it’s spiritual music.

Maybe it’s music to awaken my heart.

So when my mom texts me and asks me where I’m moving to next, I say “I’m actually leaving the country again” and I start sobbing. I only got to see her for 3 days as she had to work out of town. We were able to reconcile and communicate on a better level – praise God.

Nothing feels stable but I know I must look to Jesus at all times. I can’t rely on my environment or people for stability, I must look at God alone. 

I don’t know why God chose me for this type of life – actually I do know- because I’m willing. I’m willing to overcome the fears that bind most people to a “stable life” -though the stable life is actually filled with fear that create stagnant hearts and lives. 

My friend said I’m like a piece of iron that God had to mold so that I can withstand anything. That’s great. Basically I’m like Iron Woman. How attractive, haha.

Just when I start to feel at home I have to leave. But that’s part of moving with God’s spirit. We must jump with Him and not linger. He has been telling me that every morning. Don’t linger, just go. We linger because we feel like we are not enough, we don’t have enough (money, clothes, abilities, friends, opportunities), we are not wearing the right clothes, etc….

But when God says “go”- you have to go!

That has been me for the last year. Feeling unprepared everyday but just going with God. He says “don’t prepare what you are going to say in front of the governors, when you get there I’ll speak through you”. In the same way, God wants us to be unprepared and to TRUST HIM to speak through us, work in THAT MOMENT. 

WE ARE OVER- PREPARERS! BUT WE PREPARE OUT OF OUR OWN LOGIC AND REASONING- Not God’s logic. You have read about the many times I didn’t have enough money for a hostel or something on the road and God gave me the specific instructions I needed in that moment. Or He asked me to ask someone for help and in actuality they needed a prophetic word or healing from God. 

The divine appointment was in my need. 

The divine appointment needed something from me as a messenger of God and I needed something materially. Jesus even said to the disciples, bring no money bag. That’s pretty crazy. I think most missionaries don’t live that way. But somehow I’ve experienced it and I do not wish it upon anyone…yet, now I have a lot less fears than before.

We don’t see God moving because we rely more on other things. We don’t give Him room to move when we’ve already filled the room with our own preparations. 

So how about you just jump?

It’s time to jump. 

Partner with me and see God move powerfully in your life. I ask you not to just give your money but your life to Jesus today! Thank you for giving! I pray God’s peace and joy over you in Jesus name!

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John 3:16

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Ask Jesus into your heart, He wants a relationship with you. He died on the cross and rose again for your sins and when you receive Him He only sees Jesus in you, not your blemishes and faults.

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Prophetic Word- God Is Going To Fulfill Your Longing

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Proverbs 13:12

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

I feel like this age is a golden age. Last night I dreamed that people were wearing shimmering golden clothes. I felt like God was highlighting upgrades, promotions and new callings.

He is saying “PICK UP THAT DREAM AGAIN!”

You might be wondering- then why the heck did He tell me drop it in the first place.

You didn’t know your identity back then. You were striving. You lived out of an orphan mentality. As I’m writing this I can feel an ache in my heart. 

I’m also listening to Korean drama music because Korean dramas have a special place in my heart, it’s almost how my heart processes emotions. That moment when a 2 people finally kiss in a Korean drama is epic.

Because it’s that moment when you feel like “THEY FINALLY GOT WHAT THEY WANT!” Usually in the whole drama you’re fighting your own emotions, you’re crying and you’re yelling at the in-laws for trying to stop these 2 people from being together. There is usually an evil mother in law, or a grandpa who doesn’t want the couple to be happy. 

Usually these evil minded people have unfulfilled desires themselves and have lived in suffering much of their lives.

So you think- okay, seriously? So because you’ve suffered, I have to suffer to?

Which I realize is the case with me, I don’t have to suffer just because my parents suffered. I don’t have to suffer just because my relatives suffered.

I can have happiness.

I can have what I want.

So what is God calling me back to?

A place of resting from 10 months of ministry. I’ve hit my 10 months on May 14. I dropped everything, left my career ambitions to follow Jesus. It’s not that these ambitions were evil, but God just had a different season for me. He was asking me to walk in TRUST.

And trust I did. I went without knowing how I would survive, financially. I kept going even when I saw no way out. I prayed and prophesied over thousands of people. I gained the support and friendships of hundreds of people all over the world. I met Christian sisters and brothers, I called people into their destiny- some were called to be pastors, missionaries, actors, engineers, musicians, artists. 

I went to Taiwan, Korean, Japan, South Africa, China, Hong Kong, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia, Australia, New Zealand, Fiji, Samoa (14 countries total). 

I arrived in South Africa with $20 in my pocket and a credit card. When I didn’t know how I could go on God told me to come out with my story and purpose. I started fundraising. But somehow I would just have enough for what I needed. 

I was in Thailand, Bangkok going to Chiangmai and had a few bucks left when someone anonymous (who had been reading my blog) sent in $30. I was anxious that I wouldn’t survive but God provided again.

We are now friends and she said she felt compelled to send $30, which was the age Jesus started the ministry- and was also the age I started mine. Since then I’ve talked to her on Facetime and she is now courageously stepping into what God has called her to (I believe in YOU!). 

God is not calling everyone to sell everything and follow Him in the sense that I did. Your calling may be to be an artist and to be an influence in the art world. You may be called to write books.

This morning I woke up with downloads from God. He said “write this down”. He had recently told me to start a class called “the abundance of God”. He showed me abundance actually had nothing to do with money. I will be sharing more in the Facebook group. If you’d like to join, send $50 registration fee to https://venmo.com/Rebekkalien or https://www.paypal.me/rebekkalien

I’ve always known I’d be famous. I don’t say that in vanity.

I always saw myself in TV, in movies, speaking on stage, writing books, producing creative projects, being an entrepreneur, owning multiple businesses, maybe be a politician.

Because these 10 months God has put me through the fire. I’ve stayed in dorms with 8 other people or more, I’ve endured heat and cold. I’ve had flus and food poisoning. I’ve experienced more than you can imagine without the security of a paycheck or a backing of a church- but TRUSTING IN JESUS CHRIST ALONE! 

That’s what I mean by not living in the fear of lack or fear of not being enough. He’s taught me to ask for help, and to know my worth. He’s taught me to fight feelings of lack or to discern spirits in other people. I’ve prophesied over thousands of people and called people into their destiny. I’ve spoken no condemnation over those who feel ashamed or guilty, condemned.

It’s time to run after what you actually want. WHAT DO YOU WANT? 

GO AFTER IT!

Sow a seed-

 

 

Police Man

“Go to Macdonald’s” – said God.

“Another junk food place?”

“Trust me”

The Lord told me to ask someone to buy me a cone. There was two men. One an Indian guy and another from South Africa. He said, “we will come back so you wait”.

They went into Macdonald’s but forgot about me.

Meanwhile I saw a young boy and he kept looking at me. The Lord impressed on my heart to pray for him. I said, “can I pray for you?” He said “yes!” I said that God gave me a vision of him drawing.

He said “I draw!” and he showed me his notebook. He said he likes to draw angels.

His parents asked what we were doing but did not seem to want him talking to me.

I understand. I’m a stranger.

I’m scared but God still impresses upon my heart to go get my ice cream cone. Remember at this point I have $8 in my pocket. I had gotten off a bus and found a hostel that cost $35. I gave the owner $30 and promised another $5 the next day.

I go into Macdonald’s and I find the two men. I said “I think you forgot about me”. The South African puts the gold coin on the table and I say “thank you. God said to pray for you”.

He is a Christian. As I’m praying for him I hear the Lord say “I have not forgotten you. I know you’ve been through a lot of pain but the promises are coming”. I feel my heart breaking and I stare into his eyes.

His eyes are unresponsive, vague, unfeeling, emotionless, I hug him and tell him how much God loves him.

His Indian friend has his hands folded, he is praying with me even though he is not Christian. But he is watching the whole thing. I ask him if I can pray for him but he says “no I already prayed with you”.

Seconds later, God tells me to pray for another boy and I ask but he walks away, seeming turned off.

Then I hear a boy cry in the playground. Someone has fallen off the slide. The Lord says “pray for him” and I walk over “hi, I’m a missionary and I’d like to pray for him”.

So the mom says okay. At first I thought none of them were Christian because one mom looked bewildered. However after the whole fiasco she told me she was actually Christian and so was her friend, she was just really shocked to see someone being that bold.

She told me how in New Zealand, it’s very comfortable and Christians rarely take risks so she was shocked to see someone so bold. She said she wouldn’t have thought of doing that as the boy’s mom wasn’t Christian.

As I’m sharing my story of following the Holy Spirit with them a guy approaches me.

He says “excuse me but I need to speak with you”.

I thought it was one of the boy’s dad but he said he was a police man and the boy that seemed turned off by my asking to pray for him actually called the police to tell him that I had “offered to pay for sex”.

I don’t know what kind of childhood this boy had but this was nothing I’ve ever experienced.

I wanted to cry.

What kind of spiritual warfare was this, but right away the two Christian women told the police man that I was a good person and would never say that.

I saw this man write down what he said and what I said. I had said “pray for you” not “pay for sex”.

He got my info but that was it.

I felt falsely accused. But God had my back.

Later on I felt the Lord ask one of the woman to sow financially and she said “I was just thinking about how to help you!!”

I got to encourage them and they said they were really convicted by my life.

This was one of the more traumatic and intense days I’ve had. Nothing like this has ever happened. But God protected me.

When I got off the bus to Kerikeri I saw this skatepark that looked exactly like the one in my dream. I also remembered that the macdonalds playground was in one of my dreams.

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You Are Enough

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Divorced parents? Check.
Failed businesses and careers? Check.
Been on an island with a few bucks left? Check.
Been rejected and outcasted? Check.
Considered running away and ending my life? Check.
Heartache, betrayal, brokenness? Check.
Debt and poverty? Check.
Feelings of unworthiness and lack? Check.
I’ve been through almost every kind of issues or challenges that life could throw my way. Even though I might only be 31, God has delivered me from issues that I can’t even describe until you get on a call with me. The hardships that I went through made me stronger.
I might not have a million dollars and live in a big house on top of a hill but what the Lord has showed me is that wherever you are, you are enough and not lacking. And your worth is not dependent on what you have or where you are in life, but who you are- a child of God.
So what qualifies me? The grace of God.
The finished work of Jesus on the cross. It’s not because my life is always together, I am not perfect, I am vulnerable, needy, challenged at times, scared at times- but Jesus has finished the work on the cross and because of that, I am enough, I am not lacking, I am whole, complete, without blemish in God’s eyes.
I am not working to be more or enough, I am enough because He finished the work.
I want you to get there, to get to the point where you can continue looking yourself in the eyes and say “I am enough”- no matter how much someone accuses you of being less than, no matter how much your parents pressure you to be more “successful”, no matter how much money is in your wallet, no matter what situation you are in life- you, are, enough. Period.
So why do you even need a coach?
Sometimes life can hit you so hard continuously that you think “I am not enough…because this and that happened to me, because my parents abused me, because my friends betrayed me, because my ex cheated on me, because my ex lied to me, because I grew up poor, because we couldn’t afford anything, because…..”
We think circumstances define us and tell us who we are; but the truth is- your circumstances don’t define you and it does not tell you your worth.
Your worth shouldn’t change based on what circumstances you are in, your worth is immovable. You can be sleeping in your car and the Lord will still reassure you “you are enough”. His presence is just as powerful.
Life hit me enough times for me to say to the Devil “I am enough no matter what you try to throw at me”.
Rejection hit. Ridicule hit me. My own family accused me. My friends betrayed me. Debt hit me. And I thought, I’m not able to fix anything, I’m helpless. That was exactly where God needed me.
He says “my grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in your weakness”.
So you think your life has fallen apart?
That’s a good place to be, His grace is sufficient. Think you don’t have what it takes? Perfect, look to the cross, look to His finished work, not your insufficiency or inadequacy.
I realized that I had to be broken down to my knees for me to realize how powerful God’s grace truly is. If I could have accomplished anything on my own, I would’ve said “I did it myself”.
Rebekkalien@gmail.com
Want to chat? Shoot me an email. Coaching sessions are via Facetime, Skype or FB messenger.
I prophesy that the most powerful and successful businesses, ventures are not those that pride in their own strength, but those who boast nothing but in the finished work of the cross.
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