Prophetic Word- October 20, 2018

Awaken your heart.
It’s time to follow your heart and not hesitate. No more guilt or shame for these are not from God.
No one can tell you what is right or wrong for God put desires and dreams in your heart for a reason. It may look irresponsible and nonsense to others but to God it is God’s dreams, so don’t let others’ judgement cause you to back down.
It is my DREAM- says the Lord.
Not other peoples’ dreams, it’s mine and I planted it in your heart for a reason. Follow and be irresponsible in other peoples’ eyes, let them snare and spit.
It’s not your job to convince others that it is right in your eyes.

Most of us only feel secure or happy when life is going right, when our bills are paid, our kids are happy, our friends are supportive, our parents are saying “I’m proud of you”, when we are healthy, when we have ample income.

But this is what the Lord said to me “most Christians don’t know their identity, they don’t know who they are and are easily shaken by circumstances”.

He said this to me when I asked Him why it had to be so hard and why I had to go through these trials of trusting Him in the areas of finance while I am doing His work of delivering people out of bondage.

“I want you to be unshakeable”.

I want you to know who you are in the worst of circumstances, to know that you are a daughter of God, not an orphan, that with God all things are possible and that you are not DEFINED by what is going on around you.

I was asking God about well, black and white Africans. There are many affluent white Africans, they are primarily the ones that sit at nice restaurants in South Africa. I also met black Africans that have complained to me about snobby white Africans.

But you know what the Lord told me? When anyone defines their WORTH by how much money they have, they are already under the spirit of lack. 

Yesterday I got to pray for a woman in the bathroom. I was just asking the Lord to provide for me and there I was giving her most of what I had left. But when I prayed over her, I actually felt the spirit of fear leave me, I suddenly did not fear lack anymore because in giving, I was saying to God “you are more than enough”. 

But as I prayed and prophesied over her, I suddenly spoke identity into her and myself included.

Stand up, rise, you are not defined by anything going on around you, you are defined by the blood of Jesus, paid for by God. You are a son and daughter of God no matter what is happening in your life. 

That is your true and unshakeable identity.

So God is NOT more with you when He gives you a mercedez or a big house. He is not LESS with you when you live on the streets and have no money. 

He is with you wherever you are and He wants us to be unshaken by the circumstances in our lives.

You might think “well, that’s not fair, I’m living for the Lord and I’m advancing His kingdom, but those who have settled and denied you are living the life with their big mansions and big new cars, how is that fair?”

I hear the Lord say “because I am the life, the truth, I am everything you need, you can only find true satisfaction in me….they might have everything in the world, but without me, their hearts are empty and still searching”.

My food is to do the Father’s will.

That is what feeds me, I feed on the spirit of the Lord and I’m satisfied. 

That is spiritual maturity friends. 

You are enough.

You are whole and not lacking, the Lord is your shepherd and you lack nothing. You are righteous through the blood of Jesus and it is paid for by His blood, not your works.

Most of the people I pray for to break off the spirit of lack have stable jobs with weekly income, they have a home, they are supposedly secure but there is a spirit of fear on them…the fear is that they are not enough and that they don’t have enough. They are afraid to move forward, to break out of their rut, to venture forward into the unknown. They are not sure that God will catch them, that they are enough.

So why did He send someone who doesn’t have a “job” but a calling, someone who doesn’t know where the money will come from, who doesn’t know where God will be calling her next, who doesn’t know the specifics of the future but the ONE who holds the future?

Because in all these trials, God has given me authority and stability in My identity in Christ Jesus. My worth isn’t in whether I know what tomorrow holds, where the money will come from, whether my bills are paid, whether I have a phone (because my phone broke a week ago and yet God led me to where I needed to be).

In these trials, I’ve learned this “I am enough in Christ Jesus”. 

So I keep going forward because somehow God has cast out all fears and put a fiery fearlessness in my heart. Because with God all things are possible and I am a daughter of Christ Jesus, beloved, unmovable, gaining all authority with all things under my feet.

I’ve left everything I’ve known to follow a God I know.

How is it possible to be praying and prophesying over someone and then moments later, you’re on your bed sobbing to God.

Well that was me a minute ago.

I went from telling someone “it’s not on you to make it happen, God hasn’t forgotten you” to asking God “I feel like you’ve abandoned me” in my journal.

This journey looks like brokenness and tears.

This is my journey. I don’t know what yours look like but as a pastor/prophet some of the hardest moments are in your bedroom.

I’m feeling sick, want to go home but I don’t know where home is, I’m fighting emotions and lies, I’m wondering where the finances will come from, I’m tired, on a never ending jet lag schedule, but yet God still tells me to pray for people.

He says “not by your strength, but by my spirit”.

I want to give up.

I really do, but something in me says “don’t”.

And so I cry and weep, and sob.

I let it all out until I’ve got nothing left.

“That’s exactly where I want you- at the end of yourself”.

It might seem cruel of God, but it’s the beginning of miracles.

But that’s me, real, raw, vulnerable. 

I’ve got nothing left. It’s just you and me Jesus.

When you follow Jesus, He will order your steps.

Before I went on the airplane to head to Taiwan, I started having dreams about getting married. In this one dream, I dreamed that I was wearing a wedding dress on the airplane.

On another day, I dreamed that I was getting married and that my mom had already ordered flowers.

SO let me just tell you, I had one dream where God said “get ready, and there were pictures of different guys and I was swiping”….and it has come true, God has led me to meet so many great men of God…I’m actually in total awe because I had a misconception that there were “no more good men around”.

But the truth is there is tons, but you will only meet them when you are following Jesus.

HAHAHA.

Which leads me to many testimonies of this trip.

I posted this on my facebook wall:

TESTIMONY and Prophetic Word for New Life City Church Cape Town 
This morning I felt led to go to church and before I even looked up a church I noticed a sign “New Life City Church” across the street. I said GOD you are making this easy for you. Praise God.

The message was about allowing holy spirit to move in the church and not being hindered by positional hierarchy (allowing church to minister to church), I start laughing.

I have many feels.

I am a woman of tears.

This season I find myself consecrated to God in pools and floods of tears.

He calls me to walk on water and at times I stare at the water, how deep is it? What would it feel like to fall? What would it feel like to drown?

I have these questions and doubts and my heart can’t comprehend the extent of His love…

I often say yes but there are times when He tells me to pray for someone and I say “God not this time, I can’t”.

And He says “my grace is sufficient for you”.

I know that someone’s miracle may be in my words and prayer. But the fears creep in. It’s a total stranger, it’s a group of people. They can reject me, they have a right to.

That fear sometimes grips my heart and I’m unable to say yes.

Because it’s too quick God! I just prayed for someone in front of Starbucks, you want me to walk up to someone who doesn’t speak any English and try to explain that I want to pray for him?

Yes. Because I love this man.

So I am sending you.

Reckless love, a love that knows no fear. This is what I am discovering about God. He wants His children to have no fear.

I thought I knew anything about love but when I’m confronted with my own fears I realize God is breaking off any measure of fear.

His love is so big He desires for me to love in a big way, without fear.

I am completely wrecked.

What kind of crazy love is this? This love that has no fear of rejection, a love that Is perfect.

A love that says I’ll put my heart out there regardless of how you will respond. God is not afraid of rejection, He will keep knocking until you open the door.

God will love in face of persecution and hate.

I will love even if I face rejection and persecution because this is my purpose. Love.

Come to me says the Lord, I will make your heart brave.

– I am holding a stranger’s baby. You see how open people are to love?