Walk In The Unknown

I moved a lot growing up so I was constantly walking into the unknown. Not by choice though. Me in Germany.

Most of our society walks in the known. The known is comfortable, safe, without unknowns but God constantly pushes us to trust Him to walk with Him in the unknowns.

So that’s where though we think we are “resting” often we are submitting to fear. It’s sounds strange because of course some people seriously need to rest but most people sit in front of the television as the world passes by.

Watching tv is not resting. Yes, there are seasons of that but even in this season I feel wary thinking about the future.

I’m back in LA but heading out June 24.

I’m not sure what to expect and to be honest I’m a little traumatized by everything I went through this year ministering on the road. I’m not sure if I ever want to experience it again yet I know God is calling me to a higher level of faith.

I kind of hate that He has called me to this life.

I keep telling Him “I can’t do it”.

I can’t go on anymore.

I feel numb.

And that’s my heart wanting to be comfortable, to succumb to fear.

Jesus- You can do anything you set your mind to.

Well what if I don’t want to? What if I want to live a boring life?

Jesus- then you’ll be bored.

Okay then.

God I kind of don’t want to trust you.

Jesus- you’re not an orphan, you’re a child of God.

Me- but I went through a lot of things I didn’t really want to go through.

Jesus- but you got through it.

Me- but I have bad memories from it and I’m mentally trying to protect myself from future instances of a) being severely accused of or rejected by people I minister to b) having to be on the streets and having to ask judgmental people for help c) the list goes on.

Jesus- you are enough.

Don’t settle for the past or even think about the past. Move forward.

Me- My body and psyche can’t seem to move forward.

Jesus- let go and focus on me. Let go of every hindering memory and focus on me. Focus on my goodness. The enemy wants you to focus on the bad experiences. I am a good father – do you trust me?

Me- no not right now. But I’m still following you- I just don’t feel the joy.

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

2 Corinthians 4:8

This is my process. I know it’s been a hard week for some of you and in the battle it’s easy to lose joy so I pray right now God will bring back joy into your heart and if you need to cry- cry. I pray encouragement over your hearts.

I will be heading to Taiwan then China. I’m not sure what God has in store but I know most missionaries are getting kicked out of China so it helps that I’m independent in the sense that I’m just going where the spirit leads instead of being stationed like most missionaries.

I am now raising funds for what’s ahead. Flight tickets and living fees. Would you consider partnering with me in bringing Christ to the world?

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Testimony From A Musician I Met In Auckland

Thank you to a beautiful soul for writing this testimony. I am so glad the nightmares stopped for Shayne and I am encouraged to see the fruits of my labor- that it hasn’t been in vain. I also grew up with a highly critical mother so encouraging words are highly prized for me. To be honest, there are very few people that come back to thank me. I know that I have always done it because I love Jesus, I don’t do it for men- but when someone comes back and gives appreciation- my heart is encouraged. Words are more powerful than anything in the world. So I am truly grateful for this testimony to keep encouraging me on this path of following God.

“I met rebekka in a chinese food restaurant across the street from the hotel I was staying at when she came over and introduced herself. she was interested in me and travel buddy because of my t-shirt and our hometown LA in common. as we got to talking I got to hear lots about her situation traveling and listening to god. eventually she asked if she could pray for us.

I’m not religious but I’m always tolerant of people who mean well and I could obviously feel Rebekkas warm intent. When she prayed for me however it was not like any other prayer she read deep with in my travel buddy, Shayne and claimed to see her drawing pretty flowers and calligraphy. my mouth dropped because I knew how fantastic of an artist Shayne was/is. As if I wasn’t already blown away already, it was then my turn.

I was half deflated because I had already told Rebekka i’m a musician and about my band, I thought for sure she would say something about music and it wouldn’t be quite as impressive to me. however of all things she could’ve said she told me she saw a parent figure yelling at me perhaps my dad? I was floored a couple weeks prior to our trip I was explaining to Shayne how I read about the effects on self confidence in a person who’s yelled at growing up. She assured me that god loved me and that I am whole. after that we parted only to find that we were staying at the same hotel. Shayne and I grabbed a bottle of wine and some chocolate to indulge in while playing pool in the lobby late at night. As the wine bottle emptied I had more questions I remember saying I wish Rebekka was here.

Low and behold five minutes later Rebekka was in the lobby claiming that she had heard music and fall asleep, that there was too much uncertainty and that she felt like were staying in that side of the hotel (she pointed) and was correct. I later came to the conclusion that if any two people were to sound of music it would be us. She offered to share with us more of her prophetic gift this time getting even deeper with Shayne who mentioned her nightmares that have tormented her since she was a child. Rebekka prayed that the nightmares would stop and they did. For a couple of months Shaynes dreams were purely light. I encourage anyone who’s curious and a higher power to listen to what Rebekka has to say. And Rebekka I hope you’re doing amazing you’ve had an incredibly positive impact on our lives. thanks again”

Thank you Luke!!!

I also want to share my side of the story. I had just come back from the north side of New Zealand, God told me to go back to Auckland and a receptionist I prayed for in Paiha, offered to book a hostel room for me when I asked for a donation. I was shocked and felt God’s provision because I was literally on my last few dollars.

When we looked online I felt God said “you have to stay at kiwi hotel”.

I took a nap and woke up to eat. I felt I had to go across the street and wanted Chinese food. I was looking at different menus but when I walked past a noodle/dumpling place I kept hearing dumplings, dumplings, dumplings.

Okay God. I went in and sat there for almost 2 hours watching Korean drama. I wasn’t in the mood to pray or prophesy over anyone. In fact, I felt a lot of lack and felt that God was pushing me too hard. I had stayed one night in each place He told me to go. In 14 days I’ve probably stayed in 14 different hostels. It was really hard.

I met people on buses, hostels and these were divine and specificities encounters. He had provided the finances for each day as I obeyed and ministered to people, but each day was full of uncertainty and I was tired of stepping out in faith.

The day before I had to ask 10 backpackers for help and ended up prophesying over all of them. The hostel claimed that I didn’t pay when I did on my card. In the north of New Zealand a police man showed up saying a boy accused me of basically being a pedophile after I asked to pray for him. So my share of hardship was piling up. This kind of challenge was normal in my year of following Jesus.

When I was eating I suddenly looked up and saw Luke’s t-shirt. I was tired of being brave. I had been brave everyday and couldn’t be any braver. I was also physically exhausted and discouraged at times. Suddenly the whole restaurant was empty but the two and I.

It prompted me to go ask for a photo of his shirt and our conversation naturally led to me asking to pray for them. Without even asking, Luke said he wanted to contribute and said “here- dinner is on me”.

I got to my room and was going to sleep but suddenly heard music coming from next door. I thought maybe it is them. I went downstairs to ask for another room and that’s when I saw them at the pool table. I was like wow.

And what he said ensued.

God’s ways are beyond what we can imagine.

I hope this shows you the power of prophesy and when we speak into peoples’ hearts what God is saying versus judgement because judgment is pure evil and judgment is of the devil, not God. God’s heart is always to bless and prosper us with words of life, not death.

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Jesus Was Not A People Pleaser

Today I had a huge revelation.

I don’t realize this but at times I feel pressured to be something I’m not because some people use financial contribution to manipulate or force me to be something I’m not.

In the beginning of ministry, when I was in Bali- a Christian wrote me and asked me several questions. How much do you spend per month, how do you know it is God speaking to you, etc. He said by knowing these things he would be more knowledgeable about how he and his wife could support me.

At first I replied thinking, wow- this guy and his wife wants to support me and contribute to what I’m doing.

But then after he said that God told him to observe what I’m doing.

I doubt that God told him to micro manage me. When God says to people – watch and learn, He is not saying “micromanage her and find out the how’s”…He is saying “watch how she steps out in faith without knowing how”.

That is how I’ve lived in the last year and even before that.

After quitting my job in 2011 I never really knew how God would provide exactly since I was freelancing and even picking up bottles to recycle…

But I heard His voice and His voice would lead me continually into the unknown.

So when God tells you to give to my ministry, He wants you to be connected to a faith that continues to step out without knowing how.

I have many people trying to micromanage me or hoping that they know everything about anything, but the truth is – I don’t even know where I’m staying tomorrow but God just says go.

That’s how I live now.

I don’t have my ducks in a row, I just get on the bus.

Sometimes I don’t know how the charge went through on my debit card but days like this, because of the weekend, I’m amazed that a lot of pending charges haven’t gone through and I can use it freely.

I live in a dimension of life that most don’t understand.

Why would a Buddhist/atheist at a bus stop donate $100 after telling him my testimony? I don’t know. God moved His heart. He said he donates to homeless people and I asked if he would donate to me. He said yes of course, a woman on her own, it’s incredible he said.

Why would a cashier just tell me he never met his dad? To a customer like me? So that I could give him my contact info and most likely meet with him after…I told him that I didn’t see my dad for 10 years and that I understood.

People think by understanding everything I’m doing that I’ve qualified under their list of qualifications to receive their financial support, but I don’t need it.

Not if I’m going to be scrutinized and manipulated.

God’s provision and blessing does not need human qualifications. I’m qualified by Jesus’ blood alone and I don’t need to bend and break for peoples’ approval- Christians or non-Christians.

If I’m outcasted by the majority of Christians I’m okay with that. I’m approved if by God, not man.

Why would God use a young woman like me? Jesus’ blood qualified me, not my education or ordained position at a church. Not my title as a pastor or prophet, not my smarts or eloquent words…I’m qualified by Jesus’ sacrifice!

Nothing else. Not by how much I read the Bible or how much I pray, not by church attendance or how much I love people.

And what continues to gain my access and provision is my choice to believe it’s by His finished work and not by my works!

If you give you give because Jesus gave it to you, not because you feel obligated to. You’re free to do whatever you want!

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Chinese man at the Airbnb I stayed at

Fearless Coaching

God said “it’s time to relaunch your coaching business”.

Are you in need of inner healing? Do you feel stuck? Do you feel like there is cloud over your head. 
Get set free. 

I will help you maneuver through the confusions of life and give you spiritual and emotional insight into what is actually happening.

+overcome fear
+move through debilitating transitions 
+make changes in your life 
+overcome romantic traumas and move forward into healthy relationships 
+get freed from living for others’ approval

+ have feelings of shame? Insecurities that prevent you from going for what you want?

God wants you to live in freedom!!! The good news is I have been through all kinds of oppression and have overcome what I’ve talked about. Regret, fear, shame, guilt? Been there. Failed relationships and friendships? Been there. Divorced parents? Been there.

Never ending feeling of I’m not enough? Been there?

God has stabilized my identity in Him so much that I’ve gotten to the point in life that I know I am enough no matter the circumstances.

I’ve arrived. Not in my circumstances, but in my identity.

I want you to have the same confidence. I want you to live without fear.

I am a Los Angeles based coach who is currently in New Zealand (or some other country). Coaching sessions are conducted via video calls.

All sessions are completed via Skype, FaceTime or fb messenger video! $89 usd for an hour intro coaching session. Get unstuck!

Submit your payment to and send me an email at rebekkalien@gmail.com with the answer to “why you would like to get coaching”.

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The People Pleaser & The Master Manipulator, Finding Wholeness in a World That Lacks Love

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Today we will talk about two types of people:

  1. The people pleaser- always playing in line with what others want, in fear of judgement, rejection, feelings of shame, and feelings of unworthiness.
  2. Master manipulator- angry at what life didn’t give them, manipulating others to get what they want

Both operate from a spirit of lack.

This post may hit at the target at everything you’ve ever felt in your whole life.

I have been both but for much of my life I was a people pleaser. My mother often “made me” feel guilty or ashamed to be alive. My dad was supposedly cheating on my mother when she was pregnant with me so I often felt like I was paying penance with my life, subjugated to simply do what she wanted me to so that she wouldn’t feel so bad about herself.

I wonder how many of us feel this way? That we aren’t worthy to even be alive.

It wasn’t my fault.

The same spirit that accused and blamed me my whole life, even using my mom’s anger towards herself and her life circumstances accused me this week.

An airbnb owner (who happens to be pregnant) accused me of asking for too much when I asked for a quiet house on several occasions. Apparently the housemate was offended. Here I was thinking that we were all becoming friends when in actuality, they were talking behind my back.

She came home, exploding. She said I was selfish for expecting everyone to cater towards my need. I said “you opened an airbnb business, it was your choice, and I’m simply being honest”.

I knew that this was all the devil trying to accuse me.

I felt guilty when the owner stopped talking to me. When I said hi the other day she didn’t even look at me.

I felt my shoulders tighten.

Then it hit me. My mom does that when she is mad at me. She doesn’t acknowledge my existence as a way to punish me. I wonder if that’s connected with her blaming me for her pain, her pain of feeling abandoned by my dad, her pain of feeling neglected, unloved.

It’s not my fault though.

Finally, it’s not my fault. It’s not my fault. And it’s not your fault, however your parents punish you for their own feelings of unworthiness. 

I kept hearing God say “it’s not your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong, you were simply being honest and speaking up for your needs”. 

The owner’s accusation was a way to make me feel guilty for speaking up and wanting what I wanted.

Perhaps that is why most people stop asking for what they want or need- because they have a fear that people will reject, shame, judge or condemn them for their desires or opinions.

I felt a sense of responsibility to right the wrong- but I didn’t do anything wrong, I was only speaking my mind and truth.

Shame and guilt shuts people up.

Shame causes people to be silent. 

I realized that this wasn’t about me, it was about the owner. She was too stressed, working full time, managing an airbnb (her own house), pregnant.

Was it that I was being selfish or that she just wasn’t loving herself enough?

People who call others selfish usually don’t love themselves enough and aren’t “selfish” enough. They live out of a spirit of lack and often expect others to compensate for the lack of love they feel. 

In actuality, no one is responsible to love you. It’s your responsibility to love yourself first, to allow God to love you and then to speak up for what it is you need and want. Sure, in a relationship, in family, people do love you, but they do it out of what they are capable of doing. Most people don’t have ENOUGH love to give because they don’t realize they are enough in Christ Jesus.

People can only love you to the capacity they love themselves. If they “love” you above what they can give themselves, they are “sacrificing” themselves at the cost of loving you. And there is then a deficit. a shortage. When there is a shortage, people often feel bitter about the love they give you.

In truth, all of what I described is not love at all, it’s actually based out of fear. 

People sacrifice themselves at the cost of loving themselves because they fear that you will essentially LEAVE or reject them if they don’t sacrifice themselves.

But there is no fear in love because perfect love casts out fear.

So what would it look like to live in love? 

  1. Speaking up for how I actually feel, need and want without fear of judgement or rejection.
  2. There is no need for “sacrifice”, just love.
  3. Sure there may be compromises, but not compromises that are based out of fear.

The owner told me that it is in Malaysian culture to sacrifice to the point that they can’t take it anymore. But when I talked to two male Malaysians, they said “no, I don’t believe that” so I wonder if it’s mostly just with women….this theme of sacrifice.

I don’t need to sacrifice because Jesus became the ultimate sacrifice on the cross.

Sure, I have left everything to follow Jesus to share the love of Christ with people, but in truth, it’s not a sacrifice because I am following my heart and what truly gives me fulfillment. 

My heart is full when I love people, and when I allow others that I meet to love me. But I ultimately go to God.

God does not call us to sacrifice, he says come to me with a broken and contrite heart, this I will not despise. He doesn’t call us to be strong, He calls us to lay ourselves at His feet at all times. 

I found myself fighting this battle of shame and guilt through words and prayer.

“I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus, there is no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus”. 

We battle with not enough, we battle with feelings of shame, guilt, condemnation- but in Christ, we are enough and we are righteous.

When you know you are enough in Christ Jesus, you’ll love with an open heart, one that is pure and without manipulation, guilt, witchcraft, control or a need to sacrifice.

When we sacrifice, we live out of a belief that there is lack, that somewhere God won’t fill the void if we don’t personally fill it. 

But in Christ, there is no lack. There is only an abundance of love. So if we are not able, say so. Christ is more than enough. God does not need us to be strong. God wants us to be weak and for Him to be strong for us.

Sow a seed- Your giving makes changing lives possible as I minister to and share the gospel of grace to people around the world! There is an ongoing need to fulfill the mandate the Lord has put on my life. Join me as I change and save lives! 

Thank you! 

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The Grass Is Always Green On God’s Side- You Are Enough.

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The enemy of our soul often makes us feel like we are lacking, like life will be better “WHEN___________ (this happens)”. Whatever this is.

When I buy a new car, I’ll be happier.

When I buy that dress, I’ll be happier.

When my husband comes, I’ll be happier.

When money comes, I’ll be happier.

When I retire, I’ll be happier.

When I get to this or that country, when I travel, I’ll be happier.

All of those mindsets are actually based on the spirit of lack, not abundance. 

You already have what you need to do what you need to do, or even want to do.

When you realize your identity in Christ Jesus, you live from a spirit of “enough”. I am enough because of what Jesus did on the cross for me, I am not lacking.

Your bills might be late, you might have debt in the human realm, your husband or wife might be mad at you, your children might be out there somewhere and you have no control over them (rightly so), you might have acne on your face, you might have a layer of fat on your stomach, you might have high cholesterol, but in Christ you are whole.

So how do we live in that wholeness?

Because we live in a world that is imperfect and there always seems to be some kind of problem – such as my phone that is dead and resurrected a few times, a black hole in the center of the screen, cracked screen. Life can be frustrating.

And I found myself feeling uneven. God I’m doing all this for you, I layed down my life for you, and this is what I get?

I get a half working phone, fear of lack, and mean spirited people? I get noises all night preventing me from sleeping throughout the night?

I found myself wanting to cry and even wanting to die at times.

That’s the truth, it was so fierce.

Then I realize it was spiritual warfare.

This is the enemy lying to me-  “you are not enough, you don’t have what it takes, God is not enough for you, you need to stop doing God’s work and go home, just live a normal life will you? Look, God is not providing for you. Look, others get to have some luxurious life but you are living in an 8 bed dorm with people snoring, phones going off in the middle of the night, people who don’t respect you….it’s endless isn’t it? Is this even worth it? Doing God’s work, touching lives?”

I was bombarded with lies, with attacks, thoughts that drove me to the wall. 

These distractions, even the noises, the tv playing in the middle of the night made me crazy. I found myself waking up in the middle of the night and going outside saying to the people talking “will you quiet down because I can hear you inside” to taking off the freaken wind chime off the wall and telling someone to lower the volume on the TV.

Those noises were symbolic of the noises (lies) of the enemy.

This morning a light bulb went off.

YOU ARE ENOUGH. You are not lacking. I started counting every blessing and thanking God for everything. God thank you for the hair on my head, thank you for functioning legs and feet, thank you for the breathe in my lungs, thank you for my hands that can type this blog post. Thank you God that I’ve been able to survive and I’ve been to more countries than most people.

Thank you God that I didn’t get robbed. Thank you God you kept me safe in all these countries. Thank you God that no one attacked me physically. Thank you Lord.

Then I realize that the enemy OFTEN WANTS US TO FOCUS ON WHAT WE DON’T HAVE right now. He wants us to focus on lack so that we would not live in our true identity as sons and daughters of God. 

But even if you have nothing on your back and no wallet or bank account, you are rich in Christ Jesus. Jesus paid to have you as His son or daughter and you are royalty. This identity is not dependent on the clothes you wear, the house you live in, if you have a car or not. It’s not dependent on your new or no phone. Your identity is not dependent on what others think of you….

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YOU ARE A CHILD of God and this identity is unshakable, immovable. 

I might not be able to take photos most of the time with my half working phone, there might be a black dot on the screen and the right side looks like the terminator.

I might be living in an 8 bed dorm with tv blasting at all times during the day. I might have a little carry on and not enough “pretty” clothes. I might be wearing a $5 shirt from Japan, and socks for $1. I might have a non-flat stomach and sometimes I notice some fat on my chin.

I might be annoyed and uncomfortable, but I am enough in Christ Jesus.

I might not always know how I will continue, I might not know where the money is coming from, but I am enough in Christ Jesus and He is enough for me.

God is my Good Father and He knows your needs. Wait patiently, and battle patiently when those thoughts come. I pray the Lord give you wisdom and may God remove any lies about your worth in Jesus name.

I am enough now, not in the future. I am enough now. 

To Read About My Story 

To Sow A Seed to This Ministry and what I am doing around the world, bringing Jesus’ love to people.

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Rebekka (missionary, prophet, pastor – qualified only by the blood of Jesus).

The Father’s Love Will End Your Search for “Enough”

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For many of us, we are taught that “one day you will be enough”.

One day when you find your prince charming and get married, then you’ll be enough (because someone wants you and find you valuable).

One day when you establish your career and make a lot of money, then you’ll be enough (because your worth is defined by the commas in your account).

One day when you contribute to the world by doing philanthropic work, then you will be enough (because your worth is defined by how much you give to the world).

One day when you move out and become independent, needing no one, then you’ll be enough (because you are born a burden to your parents and you are NOT enough when you are born).

All of those, a lie.

Because the search for enough is never ending in this world’s system, if you choose to live in that realm of reality. 

The search ends when you accept and believe that God has made you enough, that you are whole because Jesus took the place for your “not enough” and credited to your account who He is- perfect and “enough”. 

You are, perfect and enough in His eyes. 

There is something settling about finding your place in God’s embrace, when He speaks over you “you are enough”.

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Even though your parents, your surroundings, your peers might not find you to be enough, you sink deeper into His unending “enough”. There is an overflowing enough where your burdens are light and your responsibilities little.

All He has called you to is to rest and allow your burdens to become His.

Those burdens seem to vanish quickly, sinking into His love.

Why is it that many of us are cute and unconditionally loved when we are children, but when we grow up it seems that love is limited? 

Because people encounter disappointments after disappointments in their own life…..and they push hopes and dreams on you, hoping that you’ll BE THE ONE to make them happy. 

They hope that MAYBE you’ll give them the hope they need to continue dreaming and living, maybe you’ll be the one to save them.

The truth is only God can do that. Yes, you can give people hope, you can encourage them, but the true responsibility falls to the maker. 

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Who is the only one that knows you intimately, the one who formed you in your mother’s womb. We find peace and relaxation in His arms, knowing that He is taking care of us. Like a baby, we can sleep in peace and wake in peace.

We understand that it is His job to feed us, to nurture us, to protect us. 

But many of us did not grow up that way, so we continue to live in fear. We live like orphans without a daddy. We become independent in the physical and material realm but still hoping that someone will tell us “I’m proud of you”, “you’ve made it”, and “you are worthy of my love”. 

The truth is, no amount of verbal encouragement will ease the pain and void of not enough…only the embrace of the Father…can we find true ease. 

 

“So it’s okay to come out of hiding now, I know you have been through hurts and disappointments.

I know people have failed you, but my love will never fail you. I will guide you and protect you. I will not leave you or forsake you. I will not disgrace or humiliate you. You are safe under my wings and protection. Come out my hidden ones. It is your time to shine. Come out my beautiful children. I am your Father. I will never hurt you. Come out beautiful children of mine, kings and queens of this earth and the heavenly realms”.

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