In the last few months God has continued to heal my heart of male/father issues. He has brought me a lot of men to minister to. Young men who have been molested, and because of that, became very sexual growing up. I always share how I am waiting until marriage to have sex. I am very open about it now. I didn’t use to be. Some woman called me “different” and didn’t want to carpool with me from Vegas to LA on a tradeshow I worked at while I was doing fashion. She didn’t tell me directly, she avoided me and told other people.
I was outcasted because of my choice to wait.
I am praying for Madison of The Bachelor. She is one woman who has openly said to Peter that she will not marry him if he chooses to sleep with the other woman on the show. Peter also grew up Christian but does not have the same convictions.
I have told countless men who have tried to be with me, that because they don’t have the same conviction or commitment to God, I do not want to be with them.
There is only one man for me.
I will not compromise.
Because I am worth it.
I dabbled in promiscuity before, though still abstaining from intercourse. At that time I was broken and hurt, I was trying to get attention from man, I was heart broken over my ex. I didn’t know how to communicate or have real relationships. I understood lust, I understood the feeling of being touched by a man. But I didn’t understand true love.
Now I understand the love of God and my worth, I can sense the spirit of seduction.
There has been a spirit of lust trying to pull me down my whole life. I am pretty sure my dad had a porn addiction because he never expressed himself emotionally and after my parents’ divorce. I found a sheet of paper with nude photos of women when I was in Taiwan. I burned it and started praying. But that impure spirit still haunted me. So men kept trying to hit on me (you know the creepy vibe? that’s a spirit of lust), old men kept trying to follow me.
It’s like they could sense I was a virgin.
God has given me victory. I’ve learned the power of no when it comes to physical boundaries. Because I deserve the best. I will not compromise.
I share with young men who have been cheated on, men who are Christians and Catholics about my decision to wait. I want to share with men that it is okay to wait, that they don’t have to give into societal pressures to sleep around.
Love is MUCH more than physical touch, it is emotional understanding, patience, gentleness, forgiveness.
Satan wants to destroy your sense of worth through sex.
Of course if you’ve already had sex you are still righteous in God’s eyes because of Jesus’ sacrifice.
But Satan has been wanting to destroy how you feel about yourself since the fall. If you are spirit filled, you will notice how you feel after you have physical interactions with a guy/girl (like a one night stand, etc). You will feel drained and tired, you don’t feel loved, you feel used, you feel dirty.
Satan loves to attack you with a spirit, then make you feel guilty about it.
If you feel guilt about anything, speak “I am righteous in Christ Jesus, there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus”.
When you are transformed by the Holy Spirit, you no longer want the things of this world. It’s not conditioning or controlling yourself, it comes out of a deep desire for the things of God. But that means you have to be submitted to surrendering to Jesus. You can tell if someone is not fully healed or submitted.
It does not mean they are less than, but if you have convictions about things like sex, you’ll start to discern whether someone is really committed to a love relationship with God.
Sex before marriage is lust driven. It literally means that a spirit of lust comes upon you. I pray that the Lord will heal you of an sexual wounds or heart wounds.
No matter what your past looks like you are pure in God’s eyes because of Jesus’ sacrifice that makes you white as snow. No matter what you did yesterday God only sees Jesus in you.
But I want to share this with you, especially young men and women who feel pressured to be promiscuous because of what society says.
Sow a seed to this ministry. You will surely be rewarded! God bless you!
If you’d like to get coaching for relationships, career, life, learning to set boundaries, etc. please send me a message!