Category: healing

When Love Becomes A Guilt Trip

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dating, God, healing, love, prophetic word, Relationships, spirituality, travel, writerLeave a comment

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I woke up feeling a bit nauseous, I wasn’t sure what was happening.

I could hear my mom chopping vegetables and she was trying to cook. But then I felt fear in my heart for some reason. What is this. I heard “witchcraft”. I went outside to make a live video to pray and I heard God say “go out to eat”.

Now some of you might be thinking “omg isn’t that super evil?”

Well “witchcraft” is basically when we don’t let go of control and try to control our lives due to fear of the unknown. 

When I went back in my mom yelled “I spilled the eggs, I’m going out”. She was angry because I said I wanted to be alone and it is possible she may have overheard my prayer session outside.

I got sick a couple of days ago and I made the mistake of kind of blaming my mom for it. I said that she was accusing and yelling at me and because of that I didn’t feel comfortable at home and was going out and staying out a lot. I felt like she didn’t want me at home. Of course it was a spirit of lack attacking me making me feel less than (and unloved by her).

Well, perhaps she felt bad so she eased up on the accusations but then tried to “make me happy” instead.

Well, that basically didn’t work, because each day I started to feel that she was doing things out of guilt. 

I’ve been processing and crying a lot, but then I guess she felt bad for me.

She woke up and started striving- cooking….you would think “awww that’s so nice”, but God has given me a level of discernment I didn’t realize before.

Doing nice things for others can be out of “fear”.

I am afraid she is not feeling well, so I’ll cook for her.

I am afraid they are in pain, so I will do everything I can for her to make her feel better.

When we don’t let go of control of others and trust them to God we are playing God, we are essentially doing “witchcraft” because we want to be the ones to heal them.

I realize I was wrong to blame my mom for not going home early each day. But because she was trying to control me and my life, I did not feel free and needed to be out.

I realize that may be why people cheat, because they feel no freedom in that relationship. Control plays a devastating effect on relationships.

It’s not your fault that you’re trying to help people. Helping people is a great thing, but remember don’t do it to play God. 

"Pack your bags, we're going on a guilt trip," said every daughter with a mother.

 

Please understand the difference between love and guilt.

God does not call us to do things out of obligation. I found this comic online. It really freaked me out how true this way. I pray that God set us all free from these codependent guilt tripping relationships. May we live freely out of love.

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Really Vulnerable Confession To My Dad

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dating, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, health, jesus, lawofattraction, lifecoach, lifehack, love, marriage, prophetic word, psychology, Relationships, spirituality, travel, writerLeave a comment

TRIGGER WARNING-

There is A LOT OF CRYING in this video. Why am I making this public? Because I believe SOMEONE needs to watch it. If someone can have a revelation or can come out of emotional hiding because of my vulnerability, then I’ve done my job. I love you guys.

This is a really vulnerable confession to my dad about how I feel. When I was 8 years old my mom and dad divorced and I did not see my dad for 10 years. I immigrated to America when I was 8 years old with my mother. After the 10 years I see him every 3 plus years and every time it’s like connecting with an emotionally unavailable human being that doesn’t tell his truth or disappears physically for a few days without telling me where he is.

I received Jesus when I was 12 but have had a lot of unhealed parts of my heart. I am 31 years now and God is still healing me from an absent father, abandonment issues and feeling unwanted/rejected.

I’ve been visiting the abbey, which is a gay club. The Lord has told me He has given me West Hollywood as a spiritual territory. I used to tell people even though I’m straight, I feel like a gay guy. I felt a connection with them but I couldn’t explain it until recently. I understand the pain of being rejected for being different. Of course not everyone of them lack a father figure, but I believe there are deep roots of feeling rejected.

I see hundreds of gay guys there and the first word I hear is “rejection”. I love them with a pain in my heart, because I know many of them are longing for acceptance and love from a father figure. God loves you dearly, unconditionally.

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How To Heal From A Broken Heart

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dating, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, health, Hollywood, jesus, love, Love blog, Relationships, spirituality, therapy, travel, writerLeave a comment

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You can get a broken heart from many things, failed friendships, relationships, being hurt by words people speak towards you, etc…ministry, etc.

We may try to but…

  1. Don’t avoid the feelings, go through the pain of healing.

Now it’s very easy to shut down your heart completely so here are ways I’ve found helps me.

a. Watch movies that are emotional or funny or just watch movies you feel led to watch.

b. Go do something fun to alleviate the pain in your heart

c. Talk about it with someone

d. Do things you like.

e. Rest

When we have a broken heart we feel like God is depriving us from what we want, so it’s easy to start having a really skewed mindset of your life. You feel like you’ll never get what you want or the pain is separating you from everything you want in life.

You start thinking with your head and not your heart. You start trying to figure your life out and you think of the best way to avoid any type of pain. You will think of the fastest way to get home and you’ll want to stay home.

And it’s OKAY!

Do what your heart is leading you to do.

I realize there were times I tried to force myself to be outgoing or I’d force myself to do hard things.

However, there were also times that my heart actually wanted to meet new people, go out, follow God but I was afraid of taking risks and chances. I was afraid that if I asked someone to pray for them, they’d snap and yell at me (again). I was afraid that if I continued fundraising, that people would say no or judge me (again). I was afraid that my mother would yell at me if I told her the truth (again).

I’ve seen that when my heart is healing from rejection or judgement, God will somehow send the right people on my path to heal my heart. He will send kind people who respond to my kindness, He’ll send a little surprise to say “hey I’m here”.

I felt my heart shut down when I had to cut some guy out of my life. I knew he wasn’t my future husband and I knew he wasn’t exactly what I wanted anyway, but it still hurt to cut him off. It’s like you are talking to someone and suddenly you can’t relay your heart to that person anymore, you can’t give or receive love from that person. Communication is completely dropped.

Then when I left Taiwan a few months ago, communication completely stopped with my dad too. He basically stopped talking to me. This happened many times in my life. Whenever I’d connect with him emotionally in Taiwan, I’d leave, and then it’s like I suddenly don’t exist anymore.

When people stop talking to you, you feel like your heart is undernourished but I am grateful God sent friends to speak to my heart.

Yesterday I felt like dancing and left the house at midnight.

I met a bunch of people this time. There was a small short guy, he had a baby face and I thought he was so cute. He told me he was bi. I was dancing with him and his friends and suddenly he backed off. He said that he had a boyfriend. I said that I wasn’t trying to hit on him, I just thought he was cute as I repeatedly said to him. I was showing admiration.

But he got scared, he said he felt awkward about it.

Maybe it triggered something in him.

I asked “then can I pretend you’re gay?” and dance with you? Sounds strange right? But he was basically scared that he would start liking me and have a change of affection.

But I was thinking about last night and I thought to myself “why am I attracted to a 23 year old guy who is bi?”

He had the same name as my dad. Weird.

I thought about it. I am often attracted to man who have baby faces, who are younger, and who are not “manly”. 

I thought about it. I think it’s because I don’t feel intimidated by them. I feel safer with them and I feel like they won’t try to control me. 

Perhaps it’s also because I feel like it won’t last.

Now, perhaps that’s just my state of mind right now. I know younger men aren’t ready to settle and my sub conscious mind still has a fear of settling down, finding my life partner.

It sounds weird but I’m scared to meet a man who actually wants to get married. I’m still scared of a man who knows how to take responsibility and treat me right.

I think maybe because I don’t know if I can handle it. Because I’ve never encountered it, not in my life anyway.

Most of the men I met were irresponsible or thought mostly of themselves. They had a lot of issues, were addicts to something, or had a victim mindset. 

I’m not sure if I’m ready to take care of anyone else.

In a strange way I think of bisexuals are non-commitals. They’re scared to commit to anything, that’s not a judgement but maybe a prophetic way of saying I’m not truly ready for marriage. I’m still learning to love me.

I’m still working out what I want in a man and I actually am starting to enjoy being single again. 

Do you ever get scared when someone treats you right?

Why?

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What To Do When You Feel Rejected By Your Parents

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dating, entrepreneur, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, health, jesus, law of attraction, love, marriage, prophetic word, relationship, Relationships, therapy, travel, writerLeave a comment

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“I feel like I can’t come home”- I said.

“Why?”- my mom said.

“It’s because you give me a look like I did something wrong, and then you accuse me”.

I spent many days out all day until night time.

I felt like a homeless prophet.

When I went to Korea, I realize I actually really wanted to go home but I felt like a burden. I called my friend and told her.

Everyone I met in Korea felt sort of estranged, and needed to be comforted. I ministered to young people who felt orphaned and estranged, homeless. One girl wanted to go back to Eastern Europe but whenever she went home, her mother would yell at her. The pain is too real. She decided to get a one year visa to work in Korea. 

So I felt like I couldn’t face the pain. God started to tell me to tell my mother the truth. The truth being…simple things like I don’t like it when you wash vegetables in the sink, without a bowl because I get really grossed out and can’t eat the food.

I used to just let things go but I realize I wasn’t being honest with her about things.

God’s been telling me to go out to eat a lot and a part of my mind will think in lack, but God would say “follow your heart”. My mom would yell at me for eating out, she’d tell me it was unhealthy and a waste of money.

For some reason I met a lot of nice strangers outside of home. 

If I didn’t listen to God, I’d probably be living on my own. I lived on my own for a few years and then God told me to move back home. 

When I was living alone I felt like an orphan, I was isolated and often sat drinking a beer with a microwave plate. I binge watched netflix and felt emotionally constipated. I had a boyfriend for a while but he wasn’t Christian so God eventually told me to break up with him. I felt like I was undeserving of any financial help and my mother was never the type I would tell my emotions to. 

I had freedom to do whatever I wanted, but again, I had an orphan mentality. 

Essentially I lived like an orphan and I felt like I had no parents. My dad had been well out of the picture and he lived in Taiwan.

But my heart was longing for home. I found comfort in God….and then God told me to move back home. For awhile my mother started giving me money and it was the first time I got money from her. I felt ashamed.

I was in my late twenties.

Then the guilt trip started coming.

“You’re almost 30, you should have a goal in life”.

“You should be ashamed of yourself”.

I mean there’s hundreds of accusations that came. Most of it was because she didn’t understand my ministry and she didn’t understand why God would tell me to rest, she wanted to see tangible results of my life.

If God didn’t tell me to get a job, I wasn’t going to get one and go outside of HIS PLANS to prove my mother wrong.

I’m a prophet who sets people free from condemnation, but here I was getting condemned by my own mother. That is why I have the anointing to break off the spirit of lack, because it’s a daily thing with me. 

My goal is always to follow Jesus’ voice first and foremost, not to please my mother, or anyone else. 

But she wouldn’t understand that, not right now anyway.

And a lot of people wouldn’t understand that.

The feeling of being misunderstood, accused and rejected is real though. Sure, she is a Christian, but her life is practical, pragmatic, logical.

In 2015 I moved back to my mother’s house. Then in 2018 God told me to go overseas and minister, relying on Him to provide for me. Since then I’ve helped thousands of people break free from shame and condemnation and understand their identity.

Yet, the enemy did not waiver in trying to attack me with accusations.

In late 2019 God sent me home and I thought God would allow me to move out right away, but no, He didn’t.

That’s where it started to hurt, the accusations started coming again.

No matter how much I tried to explain how I’m helping people, how I have these dreams, how I prophesy or even explain how Jesus can heal her, it’s like speaking to deaf ears. 

I realize, again, a prophet is not welcome in her own home.

And that it’s not my job to convince her. And I need to be okay with that. I need to know from the bottom of my heart how much I am loved by God. But I need to be okay with the fact that she may never understand.

And it’s not my job to convince her, it’s God’s job to heal her heart.

I was eating tacos by the street when a man pushed a baby cart appeared…it was a 6 month old baby, she was so cute.

I heard God say “I want you, I’ve always wanted you and you are not unwanted. You are precious to me”.

I don’t know who you are but I want you to know that-

You are precious. You are special. You are loved by God. He died on the cross for your sins and thought of you on that day. He is your loving Father, He is your provider and protector.

“I love you so much. You are not forgotten, you are the apple of my eyes”.

I tried really hard to tell my mother how I feel, but she immediately shuts down, she doesn’t want to talk about emotions. Maybe because it hurts too much.

I don’t really know how to talk about emotions with her either, but I’m trying.

Last of all-

You are enough in God’s eyes.

And if you need to cry, let it out, feel the pain, for God will comfort you.

If we define our identity by anything we can accomplish, it’s not grace.

Grace says you are a child of God because of Jesus’ sacrifice, not of our own works.

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It’s Not Your Fault & There Is Nothing You Can Do

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dating, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, jesus, lifecoach, love, massage, prophetic word, Relationships, spirituality, therapy, travel, writerLeave a comment

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I felt like it was my fault that my family fell apart. I felt like I could have tried harder to make my mother happy or to preach grace more to my dad, there could have been more I could have done.

But the truth is no, there is nothing I could have done.

My parents’ divorce had nothing to do with me but I started becoming a people pleaser, trying to fix everyones’ problems.

God spent many years helping me overcome this guilt. 

Even today God told me to go out to eat and I walked into another chicken place. There were two boys fighting. The dad yelled at the older brother and the mother said “it’s not his fault, it’s not his fault”. His dad was angry.

The younger brother sat there and cried but was “guilt tripped” into leaving as the whole family was leaving the restaurant and he was still there crying.

I started to feel languid, tired. Then another boy came in and he was 3 years old. He said to the waiter “I’m a grown man” and proceeded to get water on his own. That was me as a kid. The waiter tried to help him but he loudly insisted “I can do it on my own”.

I walked down the street to wait for the bus but twenty minutes, the bus was late….

I got tired but had nowhere to sit as the bench was wet from the rain.

I talked to the bus driver, his name was John. I took another bus home and immediately fell asleep. Before that I was calling my mom, not sure if I wanted to watch a movie with her as I had said I would let her know if I wanted to watch Frozen with her.

I went back and forth in my decision. I realize I felt guilty for “letting her down”. She picked up the phone, sounding like she was waiting for me. I felt even more guilty. She said “if you don’t want to watch the movie, it’s okay” but she sounded annoyed.

Here’s why I felt guilty….a few days ago, I said I went to watch a movie alone and my mother got angry, she said I promised to watch a movie with her. I said, “I didn’t promise, we didn’t make plans, I just said okay, and we didn’t agree on time or date”.

“So there was a movie I wanted to watch one day but I did not want to watch it with you mom. Sorry to say, but I wanted to watch the movie alone. God used that movie to speak to and heal my heart”. But there were even more movies I watch alone, because I realize I like watching movies alone.

Later again she mentioned, “you’re just like your aunt, you’re so selfish, sneaking off to watch a movie by yourself”. 

I know it sounds strange to some….why would I enjoy watching movies alone?

Because NO ONE can distract me or talk to me when I’m focusing on the movie. I hate it when people talk during a movie. 

So back to today………..I was standing outside in the cold wet rain,

I suddenly felt this pressure on my neck and heard God say “false responsibility”.

When I got home I said I wanted to take a nap, I said I did not want to watch Frozen.

She got angry and stormed out.

I suddenly burst out crying.

First I remembered the little boy in the restaurant and realized that I really wanted a kid, and it reminded me of the boy I had a dream about. God had long spoken to me about my future son (and daughter) and I have seen this boy in a dream. It has been an aching in my heart to meet my kids who already exist in the spirit. 

Then I realize the scene with the two boys fighting triggered something I had been feeling in my heart. I suddenly saw a vision of myself saying “it’s all my fault”. 

It’s my fault that my parents are unhappy and it’s my fault my brother ran away.

I could have done more.

But those are lies. I could not have done more. It is not my fault that my family is what it is today. 

I’ve met women who tell me “I feel like I can do more to save this marriage right?” and I tell them “no, you’ve done enough”.

It’s that nagging guilt that you haven’t done enough. 

But the truth is – you ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE for other peoples’ feelings or pain! 

If your parents used to get mad at you, you’re not responsible for their emotions, or for fixing them.

I felt my heart release as I cried. I realize “no it’s not my fault and there is nothing I can do to make people happy, it is God’s job to do that. It is not my job to fix someone, it is not my job to even explain grace to them, to cause them to believe that God can heal their hearts. I’ve done enough”.

I’ve done enough.

I am enough.

I will not be guilt tripped into doing things.

Sometimes we hold these deep seated lies and we don’t understand why we act the way we do, I pray God will open your heart up.

You may be saying to yourself….

  1. It’s my fault I am where I am today.
  2. It’s my fault that my parents/friends/spouse/coworkers are unhappy

but the truth is God’s grace says 

  1. It is God’s job to get you to where you need to be.
  2. It is not your fault that anyone is unhappy. You are not responsible for anyone’s emotions.

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Prophetic Word- Let Go of Control & Trust Me

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dating, entrepreneur, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, health, lawofattraction, lifecoach, love, relationship, Relationships, spirituality, therapy, travel, writerLeave a comment

PROPHETIC WORD –

LET GO OF CONTROL AND TRUST ME!

Whenever we make SOMETHING, SOMEONE a “need”, we are living out of a spirit of lack, we don’t believe we are enough RIGHT NOW. 

1. Witchcraft stems from fear, which makes you try to control the future through any means (holding onto what you can control, holding onto things God told you to let go, trying to make things happen in your flesh, holding onto a past word and not being present).

2. When we are afraid to take risks, it’s because we are afraid to let go of control, it stems from fear.

3. Relationship with God vs. Witchcraft (trying to make things happen through your flesh)

YOU’RE A CHILD OF GOD, YOU ARE SPECIAL IN MY EYES! YOU ARE ENOUGH AND NOT LACKING!

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How To Deal With A Guilt-Tripping Mother

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dating, faith, God, healing, lifecoach, self-help, spirituality, travel, writerLeave a comment

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New conversation with God added-

God– she’s not your responsibility

Me– it feels really heartless to leave her when I know she’s in need of care and love

God– only I can give her what she needs

Me– but what if she’s not going to you for it.

God– she will when you get out of the way.

As you know I talk about my mother a lot. She doesn’t like me writing about her but I feel like it helps people. Of course I don’t let her read them. A writer vows to tell the truth at all times, so here’s my truth.

I’ve included a video to help you.

It’s the holidays, how many people are guilt tripped to do what they DON’T WANT.

Questions to ask yourself-

  1. What season am I in? A season of rest, work, or healing? Your priority isn’t to live for someone else but to live for God and what God has told you. So if your priority isn’t to please your mother or family right now, it’s important to set boundaries and not succumb to spending every second with them.
  2. Whenever someone ask you to do something, walk outside and ask yourself if it’s something you want to do or if God has called you to it?

How to Deal with Guilt-tripping mothers or people-

1. Do not submit to what they ask of you out of guilt!

2. Explain why you don’t want to do what they ask of you. Don’t get angry back, just explain.

3. Keep NOT SUBMITTING

4. Be able to have a real talk with them about how it makes you FEEL when they do specific things like give you the SILENT treatment. “It makes me feel guilty when you don’t talk to me, you have to tell me how you’re actually feeling, can you communicate honestly with me?”

5. ASK them what they are feeling. Even if they yell eventually they will break and tell you what they’re ACTUALLY GOING THROUGH. Maybe they are afraid of the unknown, they are unsure about their life right now, maybe they are scared of being unemployed right now, or they have personal fears they are not letting you know about. 

How people act towards you usually has nothing to do with you.

People have issues, people get triggered.

Now say out loud-

I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus, there’s no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.

Things you NEED TO KNOW-

  1. It’s NOT YOUR FAULT IF someone is mad at you.
  2. If someone holds a grudge, it’s also not your fault. Because if you apologize, they may still hold that grudge.
  3. You are doing the BEST YOU CAN. Now it’s another issue if you never admit fault.
  4. YOU ARE NOT CREATED TO LIVE FOR or PLEASE YOUR MOTHER, FATHER, FRIEND or EVEN HUSBAND/WIFE! 
  5. There is a responsibility to TAKE CARE OF YOUR EMOTIONS or GO TO GOD for emotional support. Then there is going to people and telling them WHAT YOU NEED from them. 

a. For example I like to be loved this way- touch, texting, calling, gifts, spending time, etc.

b. Express what you need….I need alone time.

c. Ask what they need to feel loved.

6. COMMUNICATION IS EVERYTHING! And finally YOU CANNOT FULFILL EVERY DESIRE AND NEED SOMEONE HAS, only GOD can! Be okay releasing them to God for what only God can do for someone! 

Prayer- God today I release that person into your care and love. I cannot love them the way you can. I release all control of their heart to you. I release my anxieties to you as well. I am not in control. Only you can love them the way they need to be loved. It is NOT my responsibility to take care of them, it is yours God.

It’s important that you don’t become the person someone relies on all the time, because then you take the place of God in their lives.

Consider giving to this ministry this Christmas! That people may be set from from guilt and condemnation through the materials I produce on Spotify, this blog and digital content. Thank you!

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Prophetic Word – Break Off The Fear Of Lack

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, coach, dream, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, health, jesus, lawofattraction, lifecoach, love, money, prophetic word, relationship, Relationships, self-help, spirituality, Television, travel, writerLeave a comment

God spoke such a convicting word to me today.

He said –

“People pray for things but it’s because if they get it they won’t need me and it will add to their worth, which they think is lacking right now“.

And that’s a lie because Jesus’ sacrifice made you whole on the cross. So when God sees you He only sees Jesus, whole and unblemished.

Our prayers should be “the lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing”. That’s what I kept decreeing when I was on an island in Vietnam and didn’t know I was going to survive or even get off the island. I had less than $20 left. I was crying and really afraid. But I said God you said you are my shepherd and I lack nothing. That’s my reality.

When I was eating outside a man came by and later came back. I didn’t tell him my situation exactly but I told him I was being led by the spirit and doing it by faith. He turned out to be a believer and said he wanted to give. He was actually not wanting to withdraw money again because of atm fees, but God was really testing his trust in Him. He had a fear of lack and God sent me to show Him trust.

Our prayers shouldn’t be “God give us more money. It should be God I lack nothing, continue being my provider”.

I have a strong anointing to break off the “identity of lack” because I lacked all things in the natural. I followed the Holy Spirit to pastor lost sheep and didn’t even have enough money to pay for a hostel. God led me to where I needed to go as He told me to ask specific people on the road for help.

One guy at Macdonald’s made me feel ashamed for asking for help and I started crying.

God I am so ashamed.

I was so intimidated.

He said to me- “Do you know you are priestly royalty? And you are asking for his sake, not yours? Because he has a heart of stone and is not willing to bend? His heart has been closed for a long time and by asking you are (Jesus) knocking at his heart. Will you open and let me in? – I am saying to him”.

My job is hard as a prophet, I felt less than because of how the man responded. But God showed me again and again, you are my child. You’re my prophet. Don’t look at your circumstances, you are breaking hard spiritual ground. It was in a city in New Zealand where the youth I met at Macdonald’s told me it was highly racist and a stingy city. They were very judgemental there and didn’t like foreigners, yet it was a very religious city too.

The religious spirit was evident there as the man who intimidated me was a Lutheran. He looked down on me and asked if I always ask people for money. He was well dressed, but his wife wanted to help. She looked at him for approval and permission.

She was under control too. She was not free.

He kept saying no but finally she went to the car to look for change and when she came back and saw me crying, she said she would get more but never came back.

His controlling spirit changed her mind.

But remember God was specific about who to ask, because He knew what was going on inside of them. Remember this does not apply to everyone.

That’s why when God tells me to ask strangers it’s usually an indication of where they are spiritually. One time He told me to ask a group of Buddhists in India and they all started laughing at me. Why does an american need an Indian’s donation?

God said don’t leave until they give.

The only one that was open to Jesus gave me $1.

How willing are you to give into the spirit of fear and intimidation and give up on peoples’ hearts. God is building a I won’t leave until this thing breaks spirit.

God did not tell me to start asking people for donations until I was really ready to, because it takes a lot of supernatural courage to do it.

But the places where there is the most poverty is where God actually uses giving as a way to break off the spiritual stronghold of lack in that city or country.

Those who think they are lacking need to give to break off the spirit of lack.

One time I asked a homeless man for a donation, I placed a penny next to him. He said I have nothing to give. I said here’s a penny. I said you look at yourself and think you have nothing to give to the world but you are not lacking anything because of Jesus‘ sacrifice. Then God told me to give to him.

Sometimes I’ll ask someone for a donation and they will say I have nothing to give. Then I’ll say do you have $1? Then you have something and you are not lacking.

I was on an Uber ride and prayed and prophesied over a man. He said his dad died 10 years ago. He was grateful that God answered His prayers of sending someone to minister to him. God said to ask him for a donation and he said I don’t have any cash.

All of a sudden he said here. It was $10. Representing the prophetic word- he will restore the years the locust has taken away from you- the 10 years since his father died.

People think –

If only I get a perfect body, I’ll be whole. If I get my husband or wife, I’ll be happy. If I get a new place, I’ll be whole. If I get more money I won’t need to rely on God and I won’t feel like I’m lacking. If I just walk into my promises, I’ll know God loves me.

But all of that is actually a spirit of lack lying to you. It causes you to look at your circumstances (condition of your body, possessions, bank account, relationships, self) versus your identity as a child of God, reigning over this earth and having dominion over all things.

You are enough and you are not lacking. You don’t have to become more anything. You can rest in God’s perfect grace for you.

A sheep trust her shepherd (Jesus) to feed her and lead her, someone who relies on money has no shepherd or father.

I’m reminded when I was on the road and needed food or needed to know where he was leading me to sleep he always told me where and how. He often did not tell me where I was supposed to go until the day of because I wasn’t reliant on the plans but on God Himself. Was it scary? Yes. I had to pray against fear everyday. I also didn’t have someone next to me to talk to everyday but God always led me to other brothers and sisters as well and He gave me times of rest.

So it wasn’t MONEY I needed but his VOICE.

That’s why it says A psalm of David.

The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley,I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

God does not want us to be self reliant or be in control. He wants us to be a sheep that trusts Him completely to protect us.

When we look at our shortcoming, we always feel lacking but when we look to Christ who is perfect and became our sin- we know we are actually whole because of His sacrifice!

Break off the fear of lack and reliance on mammon by sowing a seed of trust to God –

Ask the Lord if it’s time to give– when you know you’ve been relying on money or your job more than God, when you give- you realize no I am enough, I’m not lacking.

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How To Break Unhealthy Cycle In Relationships

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dream, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, Hollywood, jesus, marriage, Relationships, self-help, spirituality, therapy, travel, writerLeave a comment

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It takes vulnerability to experience true love. It’s through telling someone how you actually feel and they respond with understanding that you experience unconditional love. Most people don’t share how they feel because they have been judged or rejected for expressing their feelings.

1. Be vulnerable- tell people how you actually feel.

2. Write down the patterns in your relationships

3. Address the patterns with the people and act counter the patterns, setting boundaries and asking for what it is you need and being vulnerable about your triggers and history.

Here’s mine-

A. 🙏 Friendships- in the past I was always just someone’s go to for emotional and spiritual help. I also gave rides to everyone when I had a car. I was exhausted from helping people.

There was usually a disparity between how much I gave and how much I received (not that relationships is about measurement).

I walked in faith, hosting events, etc but didn’t know how to ask for help. In essence I could have but I didn’t think anyone would help me.

It could be as simple as going out with friends and not being able to pay for meals, God has taught me even to ask strangers for help now…It’s still not easy, but in the past I’d pretend I was okay and I’d charge it on my credit card.

Of course God has told me not to worry about debt because He has already taken care of them.

Because He knows what we can handle. It takes steps of faith to speak up. I maxed out a credit card to start self employment and I maxed out credit cards to start my ministry. That was what God told me to do and that was the amount of faith and courage I could handle at the time. But yes it was scary to trust that God would someday pay it off for me.

Then the next step was in my faith walk was to come out and tell people what I was doing in my ministry, basically to start a ministry.

I knew it would come with persecution. But people also supported me.

❤️ In essence, what I told you is the same as opening your heart.

1. There’s hurt, but you don’t know how to speak up about it.

2. You learn to speak up about it but you’re met with criticism or rejection

3. You speak up about it but people love you nevertheless

4. Repeat (and that’s love for you!)

In relationships you have to know how to ask for help and give help.

But if you’ve had unhealthy patterns in your life, it takes time to reverse it. Or to wait for the people who are willing to love you for who you are.

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B. ❤️ Romantic Relationships

Marriage is similar to friendships.

1. Someone has to be humble enough to first express how they are feeling even if that means “look I am in a space of possibly being hurt by you”- basically saying “You have the power to hurt me”. That’s intense.

2. If no one is vulnerable it’s impossible to have a good marriage. But remember it’s a two-way street.

3. One person tries harder and harder to open the other person’s heart but it is a choice whether you want to open your heart, thus that relationship will most likely wither away unless the other party is willing to open up and share how they are feeling.

You deserve a vulnerable love.

You deserve someone who is emotionally available and who is willing to put in the work to be open with you.

It’s a choice whether someone wants to open their heart.

What’s the point of sitting next to someone and not knowing where they are emotionally. Physically present but mentally absent.

For me that was the worst nightmare.

Because I grew up with a mentally, physically and emotionally absent dad and a critical mother so my relationships reflected that.

And guess what- it took those relationships for me to see that it wasn’t what I wanted!

So what is it I want?

1. Friends that reach out and ask me how I am. And I’ll do the same.

2. A life partner that knows to reach out to me, that I don’t have to be the aggressor, which I often am in many areas of my life.

But that means I may have to learn how to be patient and wait for others to reach out to me.

Truth be told I don’t really have any patience.

My heart is more like an EMT, it knows where to go for help. It’s also an immediate safe place for others.

But I have to learn how to set boundaries and allow people to do the hard thing of reaching out or asking for help.

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What Is Grace and Righteousness?

On By Rebekka LienIn christianity, dream, faith, forgiveness, God, healing, law of attraction, Relationships, spirituality, Television, travel, writer

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Okay so recently I was hit with a lot of feelings of guilt or blaming others. It was either like I maybe did something wrong or someone did something wrong to make me feel this way. It was one after the other.

Last night I was driving my mom’s car and parked to eat my hamburger in front of Ross and someone hit my car from the back. I was shocked. 

I heard God say “let her go”. It turned out the girl was also Christian.

After I went home and told my mom, I thought “omg, did I do the right thing?” and then somehow my mom mentioned how she used to feel ashamed about something and then she mentioned how my relatives have been stalking me on facebook and basically were talking behind my back.

I was infuriated. I continued to have a dream where my mom was shaming me for not having a shirt on and all these church people were staring at me and I felt ashamed.

When my relatives went to my old house I started to tell them “you need to stop talking behind my back”.

So then my friend and I had a conversation today, she said “we are all sinners”. I said we are not sinners, we are righteous in God’s eyes.

That made me think.

How do I explain grace? 

Explaining grace in normal language. Your transformation isn’t from self conditioning or self striving or self control, it’s knowing you are righteous in God’s eyes and already accepted and perfect in His eyes because Jesus took on the punishments of your sin on the cross! So you’re not living as a slave asking God what should I do- you’re free to choose. And when you live your life from knowing you are 100% sinless and righteous in God’s eyes you are set free from a lot of bondages!

That is why after you are saved you should be focused on the fact that you are righteous in Christ Jesus and that the work of “trying to be enough” is finished on the cross.

Why does major “sins” still occur in your life?

I noticed I usually “sin” more when I start conditioning myself, or striving to be “perfect” instead of just accepting that I am righteous in God’s eyes. 

It’s when I keep asking God “should I do this or that?” as if God will punish me or not bless me if I do the wrong or right thing.

It’s when I “try to” be patient, try to be good, try to forgive, try to in my own flesh, versus just believing in God’s grace to give me the power to forgive….

And that is what living in the spirit is supposed to be- where you are flowing with the desires of your heart, freely living out your life from the inside out instead of always questioning “God is this the right thing to do?”

I CAN’T IN MY OWN FLESH OVERCOME ANY BONDAGES (whether it’s drug addiction, porn addiction, lying, cheating, murder, anger, deceit, etc)!!! It’s ONLY WHEN I PROCLAIM, GOD THROUGH GRACE ALONE! And I’m going to REST in your grace and power!

I’m going to STOP trying in my own flesh to be “good” because any effort from my flesh is USELESS!

Self-condemnation DOES NOT FREE YOU! It actually entraps you! Because then you are saying that through self-will you can break free of bondages! You’re wrong. It’s only by the supernatural grace and power of Jesus’ finished work on the cross.

You can’t TRY to be set free, you can’t TRY to love yourself.

You need to know it’s the GRACE of GOD that causes you to love yourself. When you’re faced with the truth that YOU ARE 100% SINLESS and UNBLEMISHED, you no longer have to make up for your wrongs, that the spirit of God goes to work to give you the desire and the action to live out a royal life. 

You get to live in freedom.

Another “guilt trip” I was going through is that I didn’t want to be at home too long when my mother was there because I felt like she always yelled at me or “guilt tripped” me so I didn’t feel peace being there for a long time (if she was there).

But then when I would come home late she’d say “why were you out so late?” and I’d get mad because then I’d felt bad that I didn’t spend time with her and I felt guilty for being out late.

So sometimes when I was out I’d ask God “should I go home?” and He’d be like “do you want to?”

We have to start living from a place of desire, not obligation or instruction. We have to start trusting the heart God gave us and know that we are filled with the Holy Spirit. 

The spirit of condemnation says “you have to try to be good or perfect” but “grace says you are already perfect because of Jesus’ sacrifice”.

GRACE is knowing that it’s NOT me in my flesh “trying” to be perfect, I am already perfect in God’s eyes. So if I’m not being forgiving, if I’m cussing someone out, I know I am still perfect in God’s eyes. Grace tells you who you are in Christ Jesus, perfect in God’s eyes.

Works says “you’re not enough” so you need to be “MORE forgiving or more gracious or more kind”.

WORKS tells you WHAT TO DO versus WHO YOU ARE, a son or daughter of God that is righteous in God’s eyes. Works judges you according to a standard of propriety. It’s like those Instagram posts that says “you should be kind”, well that’s actually a form of works. 

Condemning someone does not make them change, that’s only conditioning.

Grace gives someone the power to change because the spirit of God lives on the inside of them and they know they are no longer condemned but 100% forgiven in Christ Jesus.

Thanks for reading yall! Consider sowing a seed so I can eat and write!

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It is so relieving to admit, yes maybe I blabber too much, maybe I post all my dirty laundry, maybe I shouldn’t tell everyone my past, but the great thing is the more I boast in my weakness because God’s strength is made perfect in my weakness.

Hurray. I might not be qualified, I might be too much, I might be unprofessional, I might talk about poop too much, I might not wear makeup, I might wear pj’s in all my videos, I might not be a certain race-

But guess what the more I boast in Christ crucified. Christ in me, not me in me trying to be good. 

Hurray. I have no seminary education, I am not well verse, my hair is dirty right now, but the more Christ in me magnified.

Not because I have perfect appearance or because I have a great history. God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise.

HAHA I am wise only because Jesus speaks to me and I listen. I have no wisdom of my own. It is by grace alone.