My Teeraya family!
Sheree and I
Hair twins
10 days ago I came to Chiangmai sad to leave the boys in Bangkok, 10 days later I’ve walked away from a soul sister who sees the gift in me as I prayed for. My luggage is lighter, I’ve given away things but also bought things I like.
In 10 days I learned the power of light in darkness, how darkness seeks to diminish the light but has no real power.
Seeing my friend get hit by a car right in front of my eyes shocked my whole heart. I couldn’t sleep for several hours as I replayed the event. It could have been me, we could have both died, but somehow we were saved and a whole pack of people came running out of the back of a bar ready to help.
I used to have friends that were playful, we would go clubbing together, spend nights talking and drinking wine with Cheetos. I closed my heart when I lost them and felt that I could never find like minded friends again, who shared the faith and the play.
I’ve been recovering the loss ever since.
In a sense, I’ve learned to set boundaries but I’ve also learned to cherish my own heart. Today as I got on to the tuk-tuk, I couldn’t help but weep. I had the best 6 days with an amazing soul. We rode a moped out of the city, rode under a bridge with pot holes (imagine a scary movie), found a restaurant by the lake, danced the night away, talked about the purpose of healing our hearts- being a positive light in this world, seeing symbolism in things, even envisioning me with a private jet, a black outfit and heels saying “jump in baby!!”
We had lots of inside jokes such as “you want elephant tour??”
And remembering how I would say “you’re so pretty” to a Thai lady and she saying back to me “yah, ok, goodnight” instead of “thank you”.
Perhaps it is truly knowing that your time with each other isn’t forever as we live, but that you shared something special in the realm of traveling in a foreign country that makes the moments last forever.
I traveled from Los Angeles, she traveled from Melbourne, we met in Thailand. We were strangers before, me in the pool, her smoking her cigarette. Our worlds collided, our friendship arose out of our individual ashes of the past and helped to begin our new journeys into the new future.
My work is done in Chiang Mai, I’ve met my appointed encounter. Now I travel to Surat Thani, I am currently on a 13 hour train to Bangkok, then I’ll get on another train to Surat Thani.
Then I’ll decide as I follow spirit.
Rebekka.
I don’t understand how you want to sell everything bit fantasize of having your own private jet???
I don’t need things to make me happy but I know one day I will have everything because I started with everything – my heart
Good question. I don’t really have to explain myself but I’d like to say that I’ve decided to get rid of things as an act of obedience to the spirit. It’s not something I can explain but that the life I built was not what I wanted. It was a life lower than my destiny.
Fantasize? I know. I’ve seen it in my future and my spirit is remembering who I really am. So the private jets, islands, life that is unlimited? That’s something I’ve always known, but not because I need it for my ego, but because I know who I already am.
A whole being who is so abundant, my life can’t help but reflect it.