“And it won’t take a miracle darling just keep it real
This world can make us cynical darling I know how it feels
You took it too hard to set on the screen
Oh but love is not displaying a part into very scripted scenes.”- ron sexsmith
So many things I want to do but don’t know which one to choose first.
Must pace myself so I don’t over burden myself.
Just when I’m getting used to living alone, I am returning to Los Angeles.
1 “Come, all you who are thirsty,
come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without cost.
2 Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.
3 Give ear and come to me;
hear me, that your soul may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you,
my faithful love promised to David.
4 See, I have made him a witness to the peoples,
a leader and commander of the peoples.
5 Surely you will summon nations you know not,
and nations that do not know you will hasten to you,
because of the LORD your God,
the Holy One of Israel,
for he has endowed you with splendor.”
6 Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.
7 Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.
8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the LORD.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
12 You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.
13 Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD’s renown,
for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed.”
I have a confession. I’ve been throwing my trash day by day at the subway station. Guilty!
I’m never home when the trash truck comes, so that’s the only way to throw out trash.
since I watched The Town yesterday, my process of throwing out trash was very robber/movie-esque.
I walked into the bathroom nonchalantly with my “shopping” bag. I went into the bathroom, opened the lid and squished it in. I opened the door and who do I see, “the cleaning lady”! gasp.
I see her walk in, I run to the sink and wash my hands and walk so fast I stumble into an old man. I pass the ticket booth and walk downstairs to wait for my MRT. My heart is racing! “They’re going to tap my shoulders and throw the trash in my face!” or openly humiliate me by chasing after me with my bag of trash. I can just sense it coming.
With my THE TOWN enthusiasm, I decide to blend in with the people, I sneak behind a tower. Making sure the cameras are not on me. The MRT comes and I jump in. Swiftly the MRT leaves and I’m safe.
Thus, my confession. I apologize to Taiwan for leaving my trash in the MRT trash cans. I am a true foreigner I confess.
In 11 days I’ll be landing in Los Angeles after 3.75 months. I’ve been broken and grown in ways I couldn’t imagine, I feel like I’m a new person. I went through boot camp! It was intense man. But somehow I feel renewed and energized, I’m willing to live out what’s next and let my heart be set on fire, sensitive to God’s voice, and learning to love and be loved.
As posted on facebook.
My soul has been softened to hear God better. That took lots of turmoil and challenges.
Again I can’t better express but through a poem-
Demons and devils, they hunt me down at night
I see their shades of black roaming about the room
I pray for protection, softly falling into my dreams
The 4 months in Asia, hell and fire broke lose.
My own inhibitions, like fire setting the forest dried and forlorn
The lamps shake in fear, I traveled up to a bus, off a bus, off a mountain, onto a bike
hostels, roads, backpack in hand, luggage in the other
People with advice came and gone
I alone sat in my room, I alone I alone
I cried and laughed, when alone I longed to be with a friend
When too much people surrounded me, I wanted to be alone
It’s a conflicting lifestyle
never ending it seemed, blankets and carpets, laundry unwashed
The tired sojourner got massages, nails done, primp and hair salon
what i thought would relaxe me gave me a headache when curls pulled too tight
strangers gave me the wrong direction, and I alone I alone, lost again
There’s much to do when alone, yet no one to share with
the spirit beckons and holds, His hand always holding me, no one could understand
only He can when my socks lost and shoes hurt my toes.
Just a little while, He said. I am preparing you for great things, things to change you and the world.
A life worth living.
Father
4 years ago, I would’ve cared less, for your death or if you were under a truck, dead
This year, I stare into your life
nothing, empty and wasted
who will love you? you have failed, you have failed everyone around you
who will love you? 4 years ago I would’ve cared less
I know God would, God is your father and you are his son
and I, well your daughter, but also God’s daughter.
But who raised me? God did.
who will love you earthly father? God will.
As for me, I will too. 4 years ago I would’ve shot you down
father father, I suppose I’ve never really meant it when i called you that
maybe you should call out to both of our Father. the real Father.
who will love you? He will.
Taiwan will always be my home, one of my home. I love the food, I love the people, I love the place. This is where I had 4 years of my childhood, my blood is here. Shuangxi is one of my homes too, it’s a little village up in the mountains. There are greens and lakes, fishes and nature to fulfill you. Taiwan holds a special place in my heart because like Los angeles, it’s near a beach, surrounded by waters. I love water and I love the beach.
I HEART TAIWAN. The end. 🙂 I’m leaving you in 11 days and I can’t bear to say goodbye, especially to my friends here. I will miss you all, you have made my life more special, more full, more happy because of you alls.
We have shared tears, laughter, fun together. Thank you for sharing your life with me. I don’t know when I will see you all again, but I know we are fated to be friends. Those moments we traveled our lives together, that was God-given, a gift from heaven. Though we now part, I pray the best for your life, I pray for true joy and peace and hope.
Just wanted to say all that before life takes us full speed and we forget each other once more.
Rather, the results in others are indirect effects from our lives, echoes of our living ring down distant bells, quietly, impartially, implacably reaching out to the most secluded, almost forgotten hamlets of men.
In our teaching of men, we hardly do more than the housemaid’s chore of raising the blinds to let sunlight stream into the house. The teacher’s work is to remove the impediments to a man’s own seeing, to remove the things that would block the light. He cannot reach into another man’s mind to insert knowledge; neither can he furnish the light to to that mind by which it will see the truth. He merely sets nature free to work, as a doctor’s medicine allows nature to throw off a disease; his is the humble work of helping nature, imitating its procedures, but never supplanting it. He takes another by the hand and leads him from known truths into the unknown gradually, showing the steps to be taken by his contrasts, his examples, his similes, hoping the learning mind will follow the steps and come to truth. He cannot offer the comfort of a superior intellect, as a angel can, for in fact his intellect is not superior; it is of exactly the same kind as that of his student. He brings the material for knowing to the mind of his student, lays that material out in order, removes the impediments to knowing;; and then hopes for the splendid result of knowledge.
Rebekka Lien 