A lot of religious people would persecute me for this but…
A year and a half ago I had a dream that I was swiping on a dating app and I heard “get ready”. I thought it was only about finding my soulmate, I had no idea that it was part of my ministry.
I’ve reach thousands of people in the last few years, my purpose is to pastor lost sheep. So of course I am dealing with people left and right and also dealing with the drama, the triggers, the trauma of people.
People have called me “trashy” and “ho-ish” for talking to guys but believe it or not, a lot of the lost sheep that God brings to me now are men.
Some conservatives will use all kinds of rules to bar me and tell me not to, but even when I am swiping I hear God say “him”. And yes, I may not even be attracted to them. But that’s how I live everyday, my heart is led to lost sheep, the hurt, the outcasted.
So whatever means God brings me to them is God’s business.
The other day I met a guy outside Macy’s. He is a father of 2, he is on probation for beating up his dad while he blacked out and was high. I see him like a father figure, not a romantic partner. I have told him this. I’ve learned to have grace for men. His dad forgave him. He has no custody over his kids because of being on probation.
I met another guy online who was deeply wounded by the church, priests.
So no wonder the Devil threw insults at me through people. People have no idea the level of love I have for people. My heart will break and forgive when the lost sheep try to hurt me. I will weather all kinds of hurt and accusations. And of course I will speak my mind and be honest with those that hurt me.
I had several people block me and I felt the spirit of rejection try to attack me.
Last night I actually had a dream some witch was trying to attack me. But then some guy put two umbrellas over me. In the dream several witches tried to attack me. I also somehow got into a celebrities’ (screenwriters) house. She was a famous screenwriter and I was carrying a chair into her home. I thought she was going to freak out but she didn’t. I was part of the party. But I was scared to be found out. Eventually I started playing “throw the rocks” with her and all these people started exercising.
Yesterday the Lord told me to go to San Diego, I missed the early train and gave up. I was disappointed but later at night the Lord led me to eat with someone who was actually from San Diego. Okay God I get it.
I met a Christian who reached out to me on Facebook. Most of the people I reach have been severely hurt by other Christians. So imagine when I tell them the truth, they do not take it well.
God told me to tell this guy the truth. I said before we even met that I just wanted to be friends, but he thought there could be more. I also noticed his breath smelled but didn’t say anything. But then I had a dream someone stole my phone and replaced it with a fake one (communication).
I realized that I needed to tell him the truth (I kept hearing God say to tell him the truth), but when I did he accused me of not being tactful and lacking discernment.
He said that not everything I hear is God.
I have been prophesying for years, so not obeying God would be disobeying my heart. I knew I had to break off the fear in my heart. I was afraid of how he would react and sure enough he did not react well. In fact, despite how deep our conversations were, he said that there was no reason for us to talk anymore.
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