This season God is asking us to think bigger. With that you are required to break off the fear that has been hindering you.
It was easy to live small.
You see because I didn’t need as much faith to believe God to provide more. If God had called me to just a few countries and then sent me home to live a simple life, then maybe have me work a normal job again then I’d really didn’t need faith.
But then He sent me home to set someone free, to train her, to open my heart to friendship and trust….
Then He said- go again.
First He told me to book a flight to New York, then to Korea. Then yesterday He said I’ll go to Europe.
I thought “God I thought I was going to live in a small town and settle down?”
God is like “you’ve just begun”.
You’re going to take spiritual territory, set more captives free. And it scares the shit out of me, to be honest.
Because I’ve done that for the last year and a half and the things I’ve gone through makes me cry at an instant.
“God I can’t and I don’t want to”.
I’m crying as I write that. I realize this season a lot of the old supporters stopped giving.
It’s because God is saying “there’s more people to be delivered, there’s more territory to be taken. Don’t look back!”
“God but I don’t have the strength”.
In your weakness my strength is made perfect.
So I admit. I’m scared I don’t have enough energy, I feel tired. On the plane I had a dream I was living in a small town and wanted to go grocery shopping. You know the simple things.
I’m reminded of Spider Man in Europe. Remember, he just wanted to go on a vacation with his crush but then he was summoned to kill and destroy an enemy.
He was the only one who could save his friends or the city. If he didn’t step up all his friends and the city would have been killed.
That’s how I feel sometimes. Why do I got to be the one to deliver people? God I don’t want to. I want to hide sometimes.
But when you just do it and you see someone’s face change, it is so fulfilling. You see someone set free from fear, you feel that it’s worth it.
So there’s that tension. I know God wants to give every desire of my heart but I’m also called to set people free.
As I set people free I myself come against the evil spirits and bondages others are fighting.
I feel oppressed and feel like I can’t go on. I feel intimidated and feel like I can’t go on. But God fights my battles.
But God wins the day.
God I can’t but you can. You can do everything through me. I won’t allow my fears and insecurities stop me.
Jesus is like
Look at me. Look at me. Look at what I’ve accomplished on the cross. You are enough, you are not lacking. Stop looking at yourself, what you can or can’t do in your own ability. Look at me. When you have nothing I am your everything! Look what I can do! Part the oceans! When you’re at a wall I’ll knock it down for you.
Nehemiah 8:10 Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.
Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Exodus 15:2 The Lord is my strength and my song; he has given me victory.
This week God sent my new friend and I on a whirlwind. He told us to pack our bags and we didn’t know where we were staying. Oftentimes we had to move and God challenged her to drive because she had a fear of driving in cities. She always thought “I could never drive from LA to Vegas. I never thought I could go to LA just to pick someone up”. Things that seemed impossible for her became reality.
It was also a relationship boot camp where every trigger came out. Following God with someone else is definitely different. I’ve learned that we need to honor each other’s differences. Just because their desires are different doesn’t mean they are wrong.
Often we would go somewhere for the purpose of say “sleeping” or “eating” but there was another assignment and after we were done we’d move on.
I’ve never gone on spirit led trips with other people so it was new to me. When we went to Vegas God said “casino royale”. I googled it as I didn’t know it even existed. Sure enough it was a best western. When I got there I thought “I don’t like this place, I wouldn’t want to stay here”.
God said “trust me”.
We went to the reception and booked a room. I still remember it clearly said “norefundable”.
The lady at the desk seemed perturbed because I had so many questions. I asked to see all 3 of the available rooms.
I kept hearing the room in the back.
Finally I asked my friend to come with me. The Lord said to pray for the staff and she told me her friend just passed away so it’s been a hard week.
Then when I was about to decide on the room, God said “don’t stay here”.
I told the manager that Holy Spirit told me not to stay here as I’m spirit led. It turned out she was Christian and said no problem! Funds returned.
It’s been really intense and my head is still recovering with how God did everything.
When my friend came to pick me up it was actually my first time meeting her in person. God just told her to go so she did. I was unprepared as I just woke up from a nap but was able to shower, pack and clean within an hour. It was two days after I came back from Taiwan.
We often want to be prepared for what God is telling us to do.
But then we are relying on our flesh.
God wants us to rely on His strength, not ours. How did my friend drive 5-6 hours with no sleep? Or how did I manage to go on consecutive trips while still jet lagged? God told me jet lag is actually witchcraft. He said I needed to let go of control of time.
God was challenging me in a bigger way because when I’m alone, it’s easier to have more control even following Jesus but when you’re with someone else you really can’t be in control. Your heart has to be open and you can’t protect your heart.
That’s why I know God’s been preparing me for marriage. What does a partnership actually look like?
Sow big this time. The harvest of souls is at hand. Join me in rounding up the last harvest before Jesus comes. The world is not forever, our home is heaven! The people who come with me are those who are willing to leave everything behind to follow Jesus. They will walk on water and set the sick free! They will resurrect the dead!
Cash app- gugibabu
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