I imagined the stilness of the air, empty space in a country house
Light flooding the house, still, that’s how I see my whole being
Thoughts invading, what if, what happens if, what about….and all the questions of can I really trust the universe to have my back?
I walked to the post office the other day…standing at the counter and have a small anxiety episode – I wanted to make sure every single document was filled out for my passport renewal. The past year has been letting go of everything that I’ve ever known…that I built my life on (and thought would make me happy, but didn’t).
I had the whole life going on, I had my own place, the car, the independence….but it was just a golden handcuff. The more I had, the more financially drained I was. I was no longer creating, I was tied down, chained to the very things that I thought made me LOOK LIKE I had it together. In reality, I felt alone, sitting in my apartment….trying to avoid nosy neighbors and having no one to talk to but the occasional skype calls and coffee with friends.
I was no longer creating great work because of an overflowing abundance of the heart, but out of financial obligations.
As Toure Roberts says “DON’T WHORE OUT YOUR TALENTS”.
It felt like I was simply stretching myself thin to cover the costs of living a lie. I was no longer inspired to create just to create…whether to create amazing art, wander the world or to come into inspiring truths.
I mean I’ve been self-employed for almost 4 years coming up in July. How have I managed to do it? You can get the book here: http://www.rebekkalien.com/lovemoneywork…the workbook part will help you to clarify “your vision”. I wrote this book after a few months of breaking up with a long term ex. I thought my life was heading a certain path. We had different visions of what we wanted our lives to look like. I didn’t want to just settle in a big 5 million dollar house and be a wannabe yoga, soccer mom, housewife…no, I wanted something more. I knew that I would travel a lot, speak around the world and travel the world….and be wildly successful.
But I didn’t see myself sitting at home wishing my life was more.
And this is me being completely honest, spilling my honest truth to you because I’m glad I came into this discovery at the age of 27. At the age of 23, I already knew I was not meant to be at a 9 to 5.
I knew it was death to my soul.
People ask me how I know….I know because I know myself deeply and what does not vibe with me, does not belong in my life.
Is the path easy?
In fact, I’ve decided to live almost completely possession free, a mobile lifestyle.
That means I prize:
1. My authenticity, peace and heart above all things.
2. Love, connection and people
3. Freedom and joyful experiences, the art of cherishing each moment is vital.
2. Caring what people think. Because I don’t GIVE a fuck and because when we live our dreams, we are giving other people permission to dream too.
3. Material possessions as an indicator of my success
Are you with me?
Or is this too crazy?
xoxo BEX – http://www.Rebekkalien.com/lovemoneywork