Too Unique

Yesterday a man asked me how many people read my blog and how it’s not enough to get ad revenue, etc.

I said “I’m not doing it for the money”.

I’ve been writing since I was a little kid so to me writing is like defecating, I need to defecate what I’ve inputted into my system and writing is like defecating my wisdom…if I don’t do it I get clogged or constipated. 

Plus, if you are doing something you don’t want to just for money than you really are selling your soul and not really doing it for the love of it. And also you’re not being authentic. If you are changing what you write about just so more people can read it, just for more likes or follows, then again you’re being inauthentic.

Basically don’t do what you don’t want to in life. 

I woke up last night and suddenly thought about that one time I really wanted to work in Venice. I had to design a bag and create a photoshop/illustrator template of it from plain image.

This is what I came up with. My own print design.

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That was my style back then.

Well, I really wanted to work with cool folks in Venice at a company that designed cosmetic bags, but I didn’t get the job.

I was disappointed and cried. I guess I saw myself riding a bike in Venice and eating hipster food. It seemed like a cool place to be.

When I talked to the woman who referred me she said “you should have consulted with me so that I could tell you to tone down your style and not be so unique“. The woman who worked in the company basically said “I was too unique”. The style is too bold. 

I thought about it, well I wouldn’t change one thing about it. Just to get a job? Change who I am? No.

And now I think about it, I’m glad I didn’t get the job because I don’t think I could have lived in Venice because I would have missed my Chinese food too much and the commute back to Asian Valley is too far and too traffic filled.

But that just wasn’t where God intended for me to be. Which leads me to a unique question- can you follow your heart and God’s will at the same time? The man at Dunkin Donuts asked me that yesterday, or actually he presumed you could not and that I don’t write like someone who believes in God.

I pondered upon this question.

Yes, I do believe every desire originates from the heart of who God is. However, like a little toddler, she may want to drive a car but is not ready for it. You can’t run if you don’t walk yet and that is why I believe sometimes we don’t get what we want at the time, but eventually it will come to pass.

All desires are innately from God.

Even though I may be too unique for some people, I realize that being myself fuels my soul and being. In the past when I tried to compromise who I was, I felt miserable. When I forced myself to do things I didn’t want to, I felt like shit. 

And people who are too unique and stay too unique will get rejected repeatedly. It’s the story of my 29 years. It may take us longer to make “societal progress” but in the end, when we do thrive, we thrive by being who we are, not who we pretend to be.

I hope you are too unique for some people or some companies. That means you are being authentic. Don’t ever compromise yourself to become bland and boring for the sake of the herd. 

PS- during that time in college, I ended up designing halloween costumes and it was perfect because all I had to do was illustrate them at home and bring them to the company. I got to do what I was good at. The perfect opportunities are out there for you when you stop compromising and stop doing what you hate. 

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What’s Still Missing In Television for The Asian Narrative.

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night and my brain started dissecting the show “Friends From College”, a new netflix tv show about friends heading into their new life in their 40s.

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THERE ARE SPOILERS IN THIS POST.

Now the director is Nicholas Stoller, a British American filmmaker. So yes, he is white. But you know what, thanks for putting an Asian American into the mix. I really do appreciate that. Jae Suh Park, Marianne is an actress, artist who owns a rabbit in the tv show. She is a side kick, again not the main protagonist.

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As I was thinking about her role in the show, I started noticing a few things that are true about a few shows that contain Asian actors in. 

They are always a little off, like they are portrayed as sub-human, not human, quirky, has a strange or weird personality or they have to be really short and have an accent (Hans of 2 Broke Girls) and are constantly the butt of the jokes.

Han of 2 Broke Girls.

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Elliot Park (gay and flirty) from Young and Hungry- again he is not the protagonist and I get that because most writers are white….and directors are too, so they are telling their own narrative by making a white guy the protagonist and tell their VIEW and PERSPECTIVE of an Asian person.

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These characters seem to have to have some kind of quirk that makes them “not human”, making viewers laugh at them, unable to relate to them. They don’t have personal agency to their own emotions (their fears, hurt, anger, sadness), but instead have their emotions inserted through other peoples’ judgement towards them. 

They are often told by their white protagonists what to do or how to think.

The 2 broke girls often make fun of Han and tell him who to be and how to think. Elliott often makes a mess of things and is reprimanded for his actions and desires (corrected by the white man).

In Friends From College, Marianne is seen as incapable but repressed as you see her act in a play which all her friends doubt to be good. There is one scene in which she acts as the man and rapes a tall white man (who acts as a woman in a dress). This scene is a huge portrayal of the repressed Asian consciousness.

She is the responsible one as she drives the party bus for a “white man” who partakes of wine with the friend group and falls asleep even though it was his job to drive the bus.

For some reason, yet again, she does not seem to have her head on her shoulders, there is something off about her. Yet, the rest of the crew are portrayed as sane and knowledgeable even though they are having affairs with their best friends’ spouses, has drug problems but can somehow get away with it.

And of course she owns a cute rabbit because Asians own cute things like that.

But I notice all these things because I am Asian myself.

I want to see shows that portray who I am, human with real fears, emotions, vulnerabilities…but sane, not subhuman. I want to tell my own narrative and not be told to be a certain way because a white person (or any person) is telling me how to act or feel.

Until then, how can anyone take an person of Asian ethnicity serious if all they see is people who have no agency to their own emotions and personality? 

 

Snail Mail Giveaway

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#snailmail #giveaway
I just saw this pic of #rihanna and made this fun card. You will also get a fun pack of stickers, paper and fun!
Giveaway ends 2/15 in celebration of love!
To enter (CLICK HERE ON INSTAGRAM).
1. Follow @rebekkalien
2. Repost this pic and tags @rebekkalien
3. Optional for additional entry: subscribe to www.rebekkalien.com

International entries accepted!!! Worldwide 🌎 love! Must respond 24 hours to receive prize! #postcrossing #snailmail #mail

 

I would love to connect to all my readers. Feel free to find me via the web! I’m very active on instagram! 🙂

You Have A Clean Slate for 2017

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In 2016 I was healed of FOMO (fear of missing out). 

I had probably read too many travel blogs and was hoping my 2016 would be non-stop traveling and well, it wasn’t. In fact, I rested, wrote and painted a lot. I actually stayed in LA for a consecutive 3 months. Yes I did fly to Paris to film a travel show, Morocco to backpack, and then to the Philippines for another show…but when I came back from Cebu in June, the most out of state traveling I did was a cruise to Mexico.

Also the last few years, I happened to be traveling during the holidays. On my birthday 2 years ago, I traveled to Catalina Island and spent a few days alone.

Instead of the “hoo-haa I want to party and dance”, I did not feel that way this year. I was okay staying in and watching Netflix. I was comfortable with the peace of just being with God. Peace was something I attained more of in 2016 and I realized it was better than the crazy drunkenness that comes with partying.

Peace was better than dating guys that messed up my peacequilibrium.

Peace was better than forcing myself to attend family events where I would be attacked verbally.

Peace was better than spending time with people who were constantly striving because they don’t know their worth.

Peace was better than the struggle of speeding into other peoples’ lanes because of jealousy. You see, there are dreams that people have that are not YOURS. Know your vision, know your dreams, know what you want and don’t go hopping into other peoples’ lanes because you have a minute of jealousy.

Shut off your phone, laptop. Unplug for a minute. Sync with God. You are enough, here and now….not when you achieve something else, when you attain something more, or when you meet the right person…you are enough now.

Stay in your lane, focus on your life. Don’t go “but they’re doing this or that….”.

I learned that if it is God, it feels peaceful. I learned that if it was the right way to go, it is peace. Yes, new paths might be scary, but deep down there exists a tremble of excitement. A scary excitement. 2017 will bring new levels of promotion, love and joy.

I see your past wiped out, you have a clean slate for a new life. Forgive yourself. Let the past go. Let’s move forward together. Are you in? 

Stop Pimping Yourself Out

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(that’s a really ripe banana)

Wisdom always comes descending into my mind in the most inconvenient times like at 2am, 4 am. But then I am an alien so I have to be mindful of these downloads and know that this is why I’m on earth, to spread the wisdom of light.

This time I am confronted with the fact that I have let things distract me.

Which makes sense because God even spoke to me through a tattoo a few months ago. The tattoo said “focus”. 

Which brings me back to the fact that yes, I can blame people or specifically for my mom for being a distraction, always asking me to go out, go eat, go shopping, go somewhere with her…or I can simple learn to say no….that for once, in this time of INSPIRATION, this season where I don’t need to MIND anything but CREATION, CREATING, WRITING, DRAWING, CREATING as I have set my mind to do for the last year.

Originally my dream was basically to have non-distracted time to focus on my dream, which is the dream to create and do what I was born to do. 

So my logic started to beat myself up “dude, remember you wasted so much time putting others first?” I’m like SHUT UP.

Anyways, grace.

Then it dawned on me, I must VALUE myself and my time first before anyone else can VALUE ME. I must MASSIVELY value my talent and skills so I can massively impact the world for change. Don’t mind the money, don’t mind what’s going on in the world.

OUR JOB as artists, writers, musicians, creators is to create out of that secret place only we can….to bring fresh perspective, to be a vessel for which God creates through and with us. 

We must be creators….not constantly consuming the random streams of entertainment on facebook or social media, we must be INTENTIONAL about how we spend our time….because as creators, WE are the change. 

Living an intentional life seems to be impossible. Everyone is just responding to messages, staring at their phones, glued to present events instead of forecasting the future, dreaming, going about their dreams.

That is why I’m committing myself this day 8/18/2016 to be intentional about putting MYSELF first in this creating process so I can CREATE out of a space of health and freedom, instead of submitting to the urgency of other people around me. 

Sign- me.

Some people are so weirded out about the term “love yourself” but really it is just “valuing yourself”. Value your time, value your time.

Stop pimping yourself out. You don’t need to fix peoples’ lives, focus on creating so that you can have greater impact in this world. Sometimes codependent people are just a distraction so that you won’t write that book, create that podcast, write that article that millions and billions of people can be impact by.

I realize that by putting myself first, choosing my own well-being, health, sanity, I am loving the world at the same time. I am choosing the best for the world and I.

How about you? 

I would like to value myself more by: 

Fill in the blanks. Such as, “by not picking up my phone when I’m creating art” 

“Not taking on opportunities that don’t pay”

“Saying no and I don’t want to”

“Saying yes to my soul and what makes my spirit sing!”

PS- I’d like to add that the term starving artist has a connotation. Only when we are willing to starve as artists for the uncompromising truth of our soul will we then have massive impact. Because it is basically saying “I am SO passionate, I’d do anything for it”. When is the last time you felt that passionate about something? I believe it’s there, you have it within you.

How To Master Social Media

Social Media can be confusing, but after opening my Facebook account in college and conforming to THE WORLD of social media, I have learned a few things to make life more simple for you.

1. Master 1 or 2 Social Media– Just master 1 or 2 and you are fine. Don’t be overwhelmed by the amount of tumblrs, wordpresses, facebooks, twitters there are, simply find 1 or 2 you feel comfortable with and start with those! My top social media platforms are FACEBOOK and INSTAGRAM. I am not great at twitter and recently just found out you can add hashtags to build your audience. If you add hashtags to instagram pictures, you will be surprised by the amount of people who will follow you just because of a few hashtags! (Hashtags are tags referring to a certain subject such as #trends).

2. Interact and LIKE other peoples’ Social Media– My mistake in the beginning of social media was to be completely obsessed with my own page. I kept waiting for people to like my posts, but realized, I needed to like other peoples’ posts and comment first. This builds engagement and interaction, people become interested you only if you are first interested in them. This is the LAW of the GOLDEN RULE. People are innately SELFISH and will not want to give first, go and give…..the return will be golden!

3. BE CREATIVE- Post IMAGES, FLYERS, AUDIOS, Think outside the box! I started using Hootsuite.com and auto-post everything to all my social medias, this way, my twitter audiences can also receive updates even if they do not have facebook. As a Realtor, I have access to programs that allow me to create fliers in minutes (I know, seriously unbelievable). The QR codes allow tech savvy folks to access more information and images in seconds. https://www.facebook.com/events/287849711361791/

See below:

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4. Be involved in EVENTS, CREATE A BUZZ – creating events on Social Media conveys to your audience that you are a MASTER of whatever industry you are in. They notice that you invited them and they also notice that you specialize in your field (for me, it is Real Estate and sometimes my other profession Fashion). After posting my event and inviting more than a thousand people, a friend messaged me and asked me about buying a house in the future. This occurred all because I was continuously posting, but also because I created a buzz through an event.

I hope to SEE YOU at my OPEN HOUSE THIS SATURDAY June 29 at 10am-4pm at the address 395 N Chester Ave Pasadena CA https://www.facebook.com/events/287849711361791/