I feel more and more free to share my truth as God frees me from any shame.
Yes I didn’t see my dad for 10 years and he didn’t raise me but how was I able to forgive him for abandoning my family?
I was able to forgive him because I saw that I too was imperfect.
I don’t know the whole story but my mom told me he cheated on her. I’m not saying it was her fault but I can understand if a woman was constantly putting her husband down why he would go somewhere else for respect and comfort.
I’m coming out with something I’ve been afraid to tell the world.
I’m saving myself for marriage.
Yes I’ve had my promiscuous past but one thing I always stay firmed on was not having intercourse until I get married. I didn’t commit to this out of guilt or pressure, it’s just something I wanted for myself.
One summer I was dating a guy and I went to Taiwan. I ended up kissing another guy. The guilt tormented me. I felt so ashamed and guilty because I had committed the worse crime.
In my mind it was cheating- which my dad was guilty of.
After many days of feeling guilt I decided to write my dad a letter. I told him that God showed me he was simply human but a son of God and that God has already forgiven him and so have I.
It took me committing the same crime for me to see that my dad was simply human.
And there are reasons why someone makes mistakes.
For me, I was dating a non Christian back home that didn’t understand anything about my faith journey. So when I met someone who did understand, I felt like I had a connection with this guy.
And through this I learned to forgive my dad and myself.
So now that I came out, you may have a lot of questions.
No it’s not hard to wait. Because it’s a commitment I’ve made to myself and God and I know the spiritual and emotional wounding that comes from even any other physical contact.
No I’m not better than anyone else because of it. But I believe our bodies are not just physical, but emotional and spiritual.
The only reason I am able to forgive others is not because I am perfect but because I am imperfect saved by the grace of a loving God.