You Are Free

To give you a laugh 😂

After I wrote yesterday’s blog post I met up with my friend and it was the first time I laughed in a long time. I’m not saying I didn’t laugh on my journey but it was so challenging I felt exhausted most of the time.

She said that God was pruning me on this trip and that now my leaves and branches will grow strong.

We prayed for my mother and my family.

This night I had an intense dream where this lady was trying to say that she was my sister. She came to my old house and tried to come in my house. She claimed to be related to me.

My mom and I pretended to get in the car with her but then my mom rammed her and her child into the garage 3 times.

They both knocked out and died.

We tried to get rid of the evidence but I accidentally touched the dead woman’s phone and was afraid they would blame me for the death.

In the dream the police rounded up a bunch of people to question them. My mom took out the SIM card from her and my phone. There was another phone framed on the wall.

I was scared of being caught and hid under the table.

Prophetic word-

It’s time to let go of the past, I am wiping your bad memories. Do not reminiscence the past for your future won’t be like your past. You’ve been traumatized by the hardships and challenges but that won’t define your future. I’m clearing your shame and guilt says the Lord.

You are free, you are free, you are free.

I’m setting you free because your future is bright.

Your future is brighter than you can imagine. Oh it’s so good. It’s better than you can imagine. It’s beautiful.

Don’t look back. This time it truly is what I said. It’s truly good.

Journey with me on this path of recovering your heart and dreams friend- sow a seed: thank you!

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Walk In The Unknown

I moved a lot growing up so I was constantly walking into the unknown. Not by choice though. Me in Germany.

Most of our society walks in the known. The known is comfortable, safe, without unknowns but God constantly pushes us to trust Him to walk with Him in the unknowns.

So that’s where though we think we are “resting” often we are submitting to fear. It’s sounds strange because of course some people seriously need to rest but most people sit in front of the television as the world passes by.

Watching tv is not resting. Yes, there are seasons of that but even in this season I feel wary thinking about the future.

I’m back in LA but heading out June 24.

I’m not sure what to expect and to be honest I’m a little traumatized by everything I went through this year ministering on the road. I’m not sure if I ever want to experience it again yet I know God is calling me to a higher level of faith.

I kind of hate that He has called me to this life.

I keep telling Him “I can’t do it”.

I can’t go on anymore.

I feel numb.

And that’s my heart wanting to be comfortable, to succumb to fear.

Jesus- You can do anything you set your mind to.

Well what if I don’t want to? What if I want to live a boring life?

Jesus- then you’ll be bored.

Okay then.

God I kind of don’t want to trust you.

Jesus- you’re not an orphan, you’re a child of God.

Me- but I went through a lot of things I didn’t really want to go through.

Jesus- but you got through it.

Me- but I have bad memories from it and I’m mentally trying to protect myself from future instances of a) being severely accused of or rejected by people I minister to b) having to be on the streets and having to ask judgmental people for help c) the list goes on.

Jesus- you are enough.

Don’t settle for the past or even think about the past. Move forward.

Me- My body and psyche can’t seem to move forward.

Jesus- let go and focus on me. Let go of every hindering memory and focus on me. Focus on my goodness. The enemy wants you to focus on the bad experiences. I am a good father – do you trust me?

Me- no not right now. But I’m still following you- I just don’t feel the joy.

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

2 Corinthians 4:8

This is my process. I know it’s been a hard week for some of you and in the battle it’s easy to lose joy so I pray right now God will bring back joy into your heart and if you need to cry- cry. I pray encouragement over your hearts.

I will be heading to Taiwan then China. I’m not sure what God has in store but I know most missionaries are getting kicked out of China so it helps that I’m independent in the sense that I’m just going where the spirit leads instead of being stationed like most missionaries.

I am now raising funds for what’s ahead. Flight tickets and living fees. Would you consider partnering with me in bringing Christ to the world?

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Where Is Home? Finding Stability in The Chaos

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I decided to write because I started sobbing. Why I was sobbing…Let me explain.

I just got back to LA but instead of the normal LA life, I found myself being called by God to minister everyday. I was pushed and forced out of my comfort zone (in LA). One day I was going 40 miles out on a bus, another day I’m traveling. I’ve been spending almost 4 hours on public transportation everyday. God has led me to the people He wanted me to relay messages to.

Like today I got to meet a father and son in the wee early morning. I felt so at home with them. My heart felt alive. 

The reason I was even going to Calabasas was because I saw an audition to be a rainbow hair model. I really want rainbow hair. However, I didn’t like the idea of waking up early but I felt that God wanted me to go.

So the night before I said “God if you want me to go, then wake me up”. I didn’t set an alarm.

At 4:30 am God woke me up with a revelation and I blogged about it (the previous post). At 5:30 am I decided to go back to sleep…however God said “wake up, go now!”

I was like “fine”. I took a bus around 6:15 am and when I got to Downtown I was at the bus stop when a man and his son asked me if the bus stopped there, I said yes. Immediately I felt a connection. God said to sit next to him so we talked the whole way. He showed me the book he wrote and published on amazon. He said he directed films and his son (8 years old) said he wanted to make money and he found an audition for him.

We happened to be going to the same studio.

Strangely, I said I started making money when I was 8 years old too, selling toys after school. I said usually the reason kids want to make money is because they feel insecure, like I did at the time. I saw my mother struggling and I wanted to help by being independent at a young age.

God has a strange way of connecting us to people with similar experiences. Then he told me how he drove a bus and sold t-shirts out of it, he traveled throughout the US. I prayed over him and said that in God’s eyes he is not lacking and that he needed to speak his truth without fear of what others thought of him. He told me how he was adopted but that aristocrats and celebrities always gravitate towards him because of his authenticity.

I really loved meeting them and enjoyed spending time with them.

After I arrived 2 hours early, I waited around for my audition. God kept telling me that I would be the only one and sure enough I was the only one that showed up for the audition. However, because of my hair length I was not picked.

I felt like a failure for some reason…maybe it was the way the lady asked for more photos of me saying “I need to see what you look like” while she was obviously standing in front of me…LIKE HELLO CAN’T YOU SEE WHAT I LOOK LIKE?

My mind raced- “she must be racist, she must not think I’m pretty enough, is it because of my growing lower chin, is it because I have no makeup on?”

I felt so depleted and disappointed…”I thought you said I would get picked!” I said to God. No answer. But deep down I knew that God was somehow protecting me. It was just an off-spirit about that place.

At first I sat in one place hoping she’d change her mind. I just really wanted rainbow hair. I don’t know why. Maybe rainbows represent promises fulfilled and maybe I felt like I hadn’t seen that many promises fulfilled. Sure I’ve ministered in 14 countries in the last year and have seen OTHER PEOPLES’ promises fulfilled, but for some reason I felt that I was STILL waiting for mine to be fulfilled. 

So I thought “I was the only one, I had no competition, yet I still didn’t get what I want?” That’s how I felt. The lady had to tell me “you’re free to go” before I could get myself up.

I went to the bathroom and started crying. 

I was disappointed. I was tired. It felt like my life, and I know it was the enemy of course...but I was just tired of being disappointed you know? Whether it came to a potential suitor not ending up being my future husband, the relationship not working out….or feeling like I had a home and then going back to LA and being accused by my mother instead of celebrated. 

My heart felt really tired.

Again? It felt.

Then I nodded off in the bus heading back to Downtown. I saw a lot of drunk people, high people on the bus. I smelled weed, I saw drunk people hitting on women. This is LA, but it felt foreign. “It’s gotten worse” I thought as I sat in the crowded Orange Line Bus to North Hollywood.

It occurred to me….”Hollywood is full of orphans looking for approval”. 

The guy with a guitar strapped to his heart in the bus.

A guy with golden chains around his neck while he spoke to his friend on the phone, “everyone who is anyone is out in Hollywood trying to make it”.

God said “well you are my daughter and you don’t need anyone’s approval”. That’s when God really set me free because a part of my heart was still hoping to make it in Hollywood (to share the light of Jesus). I thought I needed to appear in movies and tv shows to be influential but God was saying “I don’t need that, I don’t need a network, I don’t need a tv channel, I will do it my way through you”. 

You don’t need whoever you think you need.

I think that’s why people end up bowing down to people versus God. They think they need the job, the paycheck, the husband, the abuser, the relationship, the friend….but you don’t need anyone or anything but God. Because whoever you are codependent on usually begin to abuse or lord over you. That’s what I talked about in my last post, Sarah versus Hagar

So everything seemed to be piling up. In addition, after just coming back to LA, living a life of ministry on the road, I’m still doing ministry here. Then God says “it’s time to go” again. I leave LA June 24. I just follow His spirit everyday. My flesh is screaming, I don’t want to!!! I want to live a normal life!! But my spirit is like “YES, take me!” 

Because of the hardships and challenges I’ve gone through this year coming back actually feels like coming off the battlefield in the army.

I feel like a soldier coming back to civilian life, yet…still on the battlefield spiritually. I haven’t seen any of my friends yet….yet everything feels different. Recently I’ve been waking up in the middle of the night from music in the air. I don’t know where the music is coming from but maybe it’s spiritual music.

Maybe it’s music to awaken my heart.

So when my mom texts me and asks me where I’m moving to next, I say “I’m actually leaving the country again” and I start sobbing. I only got to see her for 3 days as she had to work out of town. We were able to reconcile and communicate on a better level – praise God.

Nothing feels stable but I know I must look to Jesus at all times. I can’t rely on my environment or people for stability, I must look at God alone. 

I don’t know why God chose me for this type of life – actually I do know- because I’m willing. I’m willing to overcome the fears that bind most people to a “stable life” -though the stable life is actually filled with fear that create stagnant hearts and lives. 

My friend said I’m like a piece of iron that God had to mold so that I can withstand anything. That’s great. Basically I’m like Iron Woman. How attractive, haha.

Just when I start to feel at home I have to leave. But that’s part of moving with God’s spirit. We must jump with Him and not linger. He has been telling me that every morning. Don’t linger, just go. We linger because we feel like we are not enough, we don’t have enough (money, clothes, abilities, friends, opportunities), we are not wearing the right clothes, etc….

But when God says “go”- you have to go!

That has been me for the last year. Feeling unprepared everyday but just going with God. He says “don’t prepare what you are going to say in front of the governors, when you get there I’ll speak through you”. In the same way, God wants us to be unprepared and to TRUST HIM to speak through us, work in THAT MOMENT. 

WE ARE OVER- PREPARERS! BUT WE PREPARE OUT OF OUR OWN LOGIC AND REASONING- Not God’s logic. You have read about the many times I didn’t have enough money for a hostel or something on the road and God gave me the specific instructions I needed in that moment. Or He asked me to ask someone for help and in actuality they needed a prophetic word or healing from God. 

The divine appointment was in my need. 

The divine appointment needed something from me as a messenger of God and I needed something materially. Jesus even said to the disciples, bring no money bag. That’s pretty crazy. I think most missionaries don’t live that way. But somehow I’ve experienced it and I do not wish it upon anyone…yet, now I have a lot less fears than before.

We don’t see God moving because we rely more on other things. We don’t give Him room to move when we’ve already filled the room with our own preparations. 

So how about you just jump?

It’s time to jump. 

Partner with me and see God move powerfully in your life. I ask you not to just give your money but your life to Jesus today! Thank you for giving! I pray God’s peace and joy over you in Jesus name!

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John 3:16

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” Ask Jesus into your heart, He wants a relationship with you. He died on the cross and rose again for your sins and when you receive Him He only sees Jesus in you, not your blemishes and faults.

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True Freedom

I had a dream I killed a rat.

The Lord told me to write this.

“These things are being taken figuratively: The women represent two covenants. One covenant is from Mount Sinai and bears children who are to be slaves: This is Hagar. Now Hagar stands for Mount Sinai in Arabia and corresponds to the present city of Jerusalem, because she is in slavery with her children. But the Jerusalem that is above is free, and she is our mother. For it is written:

“Be glad, barren woman,
    you who never bore a child;
shout for joy and cry aloud,
    you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
    than of her who has a husband.

Now you, brothers and sisters, like Isaac, are children of promise. At that time the son born according to the flesh persecuted the son born by the power of the Spirit.It is the same now.  But what does Scripture say? “Get rid of the slave woman and her son, for the slave woman’s son will never share in the inheritance with the free woman’s son.” Therefore, brothers and sisters, we are not children of the slave woman, but of the free woman”

He said to me “write about freedom”. Recently I had a friend come to me and say that I don’t need to tell her prophetic words so often, that she wants to live in freedom.

It made me think about how I went through my own “freedom” of being promiscuous, needing alcohol, being broken.

When I started to prophesy over myself and allow others to do so – and then I believed what God said- I started to step into the freedom God had for me.

When Jesus said “sell everything and follow me” – it was a prophetic word.

A prophetic word is something that hasn’t happen on the earth but is already true in the spirit.

I could have said no but I trusted God. All my own ways of living only led to more pain, hangovers and regrets.

All my own strivings and attempts to find my life partner was resulting in degrading myself.

That is why yesterday God said it’s time to come out. And I posted the following.

To my surprise, all the comments were positive and a few women have started to message me about their secret of waiting or perhaps not waiting anymore.

I realized that was a part of my story that I still felt ashamed to tell because I was shamed for waiting. People told me I need to have experience to know who my husband is. People said “your standards are too high, you should just settle”.

But when your mother is Sarah (grace), you live in the covenant of relationship with God bought by the blood of Jesus. So what you believe God for, a prophetic word or promise- it will come to pass if you walk in it. In this case, for me it means trusting God and waiting for the right man instead of jumping on every guy that looks like Mr. Handsome.

When your mother is Hagar (the law and your own striving), you try to attain your promises by your own flesh. This means that you will try everything else but trusting God and being led by His spirit.

A lot of times I prophesy over people and it’s not what they want to hear.

Perhaps it’s a guy they are seeing, or a job.

And I think to myself “why do they need so many reminders?”

But me myself? It did take God awhile to get to me too. Like I said after I broke up with my ex in 2014 I went on a dating spree and only after meeting many men who only wanted to sleep with me, did I come to my end and said “God I give up, you do it”. These men only wanted an instant gratification, they did not desire to love me.

But somehow I still trusted God enough to say “God I’m going to wait for my husband to have sex”. Because I believe God for the right man.

And that’s Sarah and Abraham waiting for God’s promises. At one point when they were a hundred or so, they inherited a promise of Isaac which God supernaturally gave them.

When we strive to make things happen on our way, without God we step into slavery. Hagar’s child was a slave. Whatever we attain by the law, we become a slave to. Hagar and her son never shares in the inheritance of the free women.

Proverbs 10:22

The blessing of the Lord makes rich, and he adds no sorrow with it.

What God has shown me is true freedom means being free from shame, guilt, condemnation, fear.

So a prophetic word is always to bring you further into the freedom Jesus paid for you on the cross to have.

Yesterday I prophesied to a man that he is enough and he needs to go ask his estranged parents for help. He said he has spent a lot of time trying to find peace in his soul and I said “no you just need to do it even if they accuse you”.

God has told me to do things that I was not excited to do.

I sold everything to follow Him. I returned a leased car before the lease term was over. I knew my credit would go down but I needed to live for His kingdom and not my kingdom any longer. This means that I needed to be car- less and not live to pay for a car which did not give me the opportunity to minister to people on the streets or buses. I needed to trust that God would provide what I needed even if I didn’t have excellent credit.

And true to what He has told me, I haven’t needed a good credit at all. In fact, God has provided what I’ve needed without credit.

God told me to move back home. In actuality I was at my friend’s house and God said at 3pm you’ll know where you will stay. My mom has already offered to let me stay at her house. I started crying. Hell no I don’t want to move back home. But He understood so He didn’t make it explicit. He used this tactic so I had no other choice but to move home.

During the two years I stayed with my mom I reconciled with her. God knew that needed to happen for me to come into my blessings as well. I had never gotten allowance from my mother as I worked since I was 8 years old. It was the first time she gave me money.

I learned what grace and being a child of God actually meant in that time of rest! It’s not something I work for but something I receive just because I am God’s child.

God told me to break up with my ex. I needed a few confirmations and I got them. God knew I wouldn’t listen to one friend, but it was strangers I talked to that made me realize he wasn’t the one.

Yes we are stubborn people.

That stubbornness comes from us not trusting God. But when we come to the end of ourselves we start to see God’s intention for us is to be whole and healed.

Our brokenness prevents us from living the life God called us to.

So when I prophesy, you may not want to listen but it’s not me – it’s God saying “you deserve so much more than what you’ve settled for”.

Freedom is not continuing in a mediocre life or philandering with whoever we want, because it led me to more pain and tears. Freedom is being a child of God, knowing you are not an orphan and you have a father who guides and takes care of you.

The sheep knows her shepherd’s voice.

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Prophetic Word – Push!!!

Please watch this.

Wow I couldn’t even keep my eyes open because God started giving me an image of a delivery room. I saw you in bed giving birth to a baby (#dreams) and people were outside trying to come in and kill the baby. Then I saw Jesus standing there and asking you to push. He said don’t give up!!!!! Some of you have laid down and given up. I see some of you binge watching Netflix!! God is like no! Now is the time to push and go forward! #propheticword #prophet

I’ve been on the road even in LA and am leaving to SF June 24. It’s been a whirlwind as God pushes me forward. At first I thought I was going to continue in India and last night God said Taiwan.

So this morning I had to take an Uber and rush to the Taiwanese embassy to renew my passport.

There’s been a slew of divine appointments. I went from Rancho Cucamonga, glendale to pasadena back to alhambra. Today I went to Koreatown.

Here’s a testimony from today-

Testimony of divine encounter with a Korean man- the Lord said to go to Starbucks. I saw a young man sitting there and there was a chair in front of him. I heard “sit down” from God and asked to sit down. Honestly I didn’t feel like talking. But somehow we started talking and I told him my testimony of learning what Grace is- it’s that you are enough and whole in God’s eyes because of jesus’ finished work.

He told me how this morning he was frazzled and needed peace. He’s tried meditation and is spiritual. But he never heard the gospel spoken like that. Usually he closes himself off when anyone tries to say anything about God. In the beginning I asked to pray for him and he kept saying no it’s okay pray for the world.

He said “it’s the way you speak about it. The humanness of it that made me want to listen to you”.

I prophesied over him and said that in God’s eyes he is enough and he doesn’t need to prove anything. I prayed the peace of Jesus over him.

God said to ask him for a donation and he said “actually I would but I’m homeless”. He was dressed in business wear. I said “let me buy you a drink”. He said no no. I knew he had a hard time receiving. He had told me how his Korean parents had great expectations for him that made him feel less than. The conditional love caused him to try to give others unconditional love but he had a hard time receiving.

I said “you are worthy to receive just because you were born, not because you’ve done anything for others”.

I told him how I never felt like I was enough in my mother’s eyes but when I learned the true gospel of grace – it freed me to rest completely in Jesus’ finished work.

The rest and peace you seek is in His finished work.

I told him it was time to go back home and don’t feel ashamed to ask his parents for help.

I am raising funds for what is ahead. Your contribution means a lot to me as I continue to reach people with the message of grace.

Sow a seed and partner with the new move of God in this world-

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Even as I’m writing this I hear God say “linger no more”. It’s time to move forward. “Resting and laying down” won’t give you energy right now as God is flowing in action.

Marriage

I saw my parents fighting when I was young and it was embedded in my mind that I will do anything to avoid marrying the wrong person.

I read tons of relationship and marriage books and even though I was in several relationships, I said God no matter what I will listen to you.

I did try to find worth in men’s attention and found value in being loved.

But when I broke up with my ex in 2014 as an act of obedience and faith (and after I tried to date several times) I decided to commit myself to God.

It was difficult because it was my longest relationship of 2.5 years and a big part of why I stayed was fear- I was afraid of the feeling of pain.

I wasn’t afraid to be alone. I had spent most of my life alone so it wasn’t loneliness I feared, it was the pain of separation, the sadness.

It did come but I tried to keep myself busy.

Breaking up with him was one of the best decisions of my life. I’ve grown so much since then. I went to 15 countries with Jesus. I faced danger, loneliness, fear of lack and judgement but God was my husband. He never left nor forsook me.

Jesus is the best guy you’ll ever meet. Ever.

God is enough for you.

We face so much unnecessary pain when we don’t trust God- when we try to find worth and validation from people, a job or a partner.

He is everything you’ve ever wanted in a man. He is reliable. He pushes you to grow. He is faithful, He’ll never cheat on you nor abuse you. He will surprise you. He isn’t complacent nor lazy. He is always working behind the scenes. He knows when you’re being stubborn and He is jealous in a good way. Because He’ll always wait for you to come back. He is loyal, He never condemns you. He is a gentleman.

Before I left Los Angeles to go follow Jesus I had many dreams of being married and having a wedding dress on the airplane.

What God was saying to me was that I was willing to say yes to Him no matter what He called me to.

So I keep stepping out in faith to hold His hand, not because I have to but because I absolutely trust and love Him. Because He has shown Himself trustworthy.

If you still don’t trust God from seeing how He continues to call me forward, you must be blind.

He is the best man you’ll ever meet and He is asking for faithfulness to Him. Don’t go back and forth with Him. Say yes to His hand in marriage. Are you willing to trust Him in good times and bad? Or are you going to bounce when times seem difficult.

I’m talking about making God your husband.

Sure, there are times I’m scared out of my mind but life with Him is adventurous and amazing.

And here’s my appearance on a tv show – where God told me I wouldn’t get picked and I trusted Him and sure enough did not get picked to be the bride. So I trust God.

https://youtu.be/ZJTJtQG-lsc

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Testimony From A Musician I Met In Auckland

Thank you to a beautiful soul for writing this testimony. I am so glad the nightmares stopped for Shayne and I am encouraged to see the fruits of my labor- that it hasn’t been in vain. I also grew up with a highly critical mother so encouraging words are highly prized for me. To be honest, there are very few people that come back to thank me. I know that I have always done it because I love Jesus, I don’t do it for men- but when someone comes back and gives appreciation- my heart is encouraged. Words are more powerful than anything in the world. So I am truly grateful for this testimony to keep encouraging me on this path of following God.

“I met rebekka in a chinese food restaurant across the street from the hotel I was staying at when she came over and introduced herself. she was interested in me and travel buddy because of my t-shirt and our hometown LA in common. as we got to talking I got to hear lots about her situation traveling and listening to god. eventually she asked if she could pray for us.

I’m not religious but I’m always tolerant of people who mean well and I could obviously feel Rebekkas warm intent. When she prayed for me however it was not like any other prayer she read deep with in my travel buddy, Shayne and claimed to see her drawing pretty flowers and calligraphy. my mouth dropped because I knew how fantastic of an artist Shayne was/is. As if I wasn’t already blown away already, it was then my turn.

I was half deflated because I had already told Rebekka i’m a musician and about my band, I thought for sure she would say something about music and it wouldn’t be quite as impressive to me. however of all things she could’ve said she told me she saw a parent figure yelling at me perhaps my dad? I was floored a couple weeks prior to our trip I was explaining to Shayne how I read about the effects on self confidence in a person who’s yelled at growing up. She assured me that god loved me and that I am whole. after that we parted only to find that we were staying at the same hotel. Shayne and I grabbed a bottle of wine and some chocolate to indulge in while playing pool in the lobby late at night. As the wine bottle emptied I had more questions I remember saying I wish Rebekka was here.

Low and behold five minutes later Rebekka was in the lobby claiming that she had heard music and fall asleep, that there was too much uncertainty and that she felt like were staying in that side of the hotel (she pointed) and was correct. I later came to the conclusion that if any two people were to sound of music it would be us. She offered to share with us more of her prophetic gift this time getting even deeper with Shayne who mentioned her nightmares that have tormented her since she was a child. Rebekka prayed that the nightmares would stop and they did. For a couple of months Shaynes dreams were purely light. I encourage anyone who’s curious and a higher power to listen to what Rebekka has to say. And Rebekka I hope you’re doing amazing you’ve had an incredibly positive impact on our lives. thanks again”

Thank you Luke!!!

I also want to share my side of the story. I had just come back from the north side of New Zealand, God told me to go back to Auckland and a receptionist I prayed for in Paiha, offered to book a hostel room for me when I asked for a donation. I was shocked and felt God’s provision because I was literally on my last few dollars.

When we looked online I felt God said “you have to stay at kiwi hotel”.

I took a nap and woke up to eat. I felt I had to go across the street and wanted Chinese food. I was looking at different menus but when I walked past a noodle/dumpling place I kept hearing dumplings, dumplings, dumplings.

Okay God. I went in and sat there for almost 2 hours watching Korean drama. I wasn’t in the mood to pray or prophesy over anyone. In fact, I felt a lot of lack and felt that God was pushing me too hard. I had stayed one night in each place He told me to go. In 14 days I’ve probably stayed in 14 different hostels. It was really hard.

I met people on buses, hostels and these were divine and specificities encounters. He had provided the finances for each day as I obeyed and ministered to people, but each day was full of uncertainty and I was tired of stepping out in faith.

The day before I had to ask 10 backpackers for help and ended up prophesying over all of them. The hostel claimed that I didn’t pay when I did on my card. In the north of New Zealand a police man showed up saying a boy accused me of basically being a pedophile after I asked to pray for him. So my share of hardship was piling up. This kind of challenge was normal in my year of following Jesus.

When I was eating I suddenly looked up and saw Luke’s t-shirt. I was tired of being brave. I had been brave everyday and couldn’t be any braver. I was also physically exhausted and discouraged at times. Suddenly the whole restaurant was empty but the two and I.

It prompted me to go ask for a photo of his shirt and our conversation naturally led to me asking to pray for them. Without even asking, Luke said he wanted to contribute and said “here- dinner is on me”.

I got to my room and was going to sleep but suddenly heard music coming from next door. I thought maybe it is them. I went downstairs to ask for another room and that’s when I saw them at the pool table. I was like wow.

And what he said ensued.

God’s ways are beyond what we can imagine.

I hope this shows you the power of prophesy and when we speak into peoples’ hearts what God is saying versus judgement because judgment is pure evil and judgment is of the devil, not God. God’s heart is always to bless and prosper us with words of life, not death.

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