I’m sitting in a boat, mist drops, cold breeze, nothing.
It is silent.
There were bees in my room, buzzing around a light, I couldn’t figure out why I was asleep with bees in my room.
All the venomous spiders roamed around weaving webs, strong as cords, bouncing from place to place.
The ocean rippled and roared. I sat silently trying not to wince.
“It is in the silence that you will find God”
I gave up looking, striving, finding, searching because I don’t know what I’m looking for, not sure what I want either.
Perhaps I simply want to find peace, to be at peace with myself.
Even when the droplets of water start blurring my vision, storms making me sick and cold, even when I find myself alone in the boat.
I want to find my soul settled, when I dip my head into deep waters, hold my breath and let go. Peace my child.