(A girl I met at the bus stop who said she wanted to be Christian but was afraid of her parents who are Buddhists)
I started my ministry in a hostel. I had almost maxed out my credit card and was too scared to “come out” and let people know what I was really doing.
I had been judged for fundraising outside of church establishment. Before someone said “why should I give, you don’t go to my church anymore?”
So I was scared of judgement and rejection because I had already been rejected by my old baptist church leaders, they were people I trusted and looked up to, but I realized I had codependent relationship with them.
See, if I listened to them, they were proud of me, but if I went outside their preconceived notion of me – well “I was going towards destruction” one leader told me.
I spent hours of my week serving at church and still I was depleted and I felt like I wasn’t enough.
I went home one day sobbing and shaking from stress. My mother was very concerned.
I had two jobs, college, teaching Sunday school, leading worship, and serving in youth group.
But I just put on a happy face, no one knew I was stressed out of my mind.
That was my Joseph moment, when I walked away from the church. I went into my wilderness. I went church hopping at one point but then God said “it’s okay just rest”.
He said to me “just be with me”.
You are enough.
So the guilt trip is actually not from God, because God doesn’t guilt trip. He leads by desire. There are times God leads me to go to a church, and I do go and usually there’s a divine appointment.
I’m not saying that I don’t need church, I’m saying God has sent incredible Christians to me as I’ve ministered all over the world.
When people ask me which church I go to- I say I go to “Jesus’ church”. They look at me puzzled, I’ve never heard of it.
I mean Jesus’ church.
Like God’s church.
I’m building God’s church. A church that is authentic and vulnerable, the type that support each other, not the type that shows up on a Sunday and disappears for the rest of the week.
By pioneering and ministering to people on the streets and wherever God leads me, these divine appointments I call them- God has brought me “a church” (individuals) that has my back no matter what.
They’re the type that won’t be offended if I say God said this. Well sometimes they’re offended, but they recover.
We pray for each other when things go awry.
This is the type of church I go to. It’s not segregated by denomination, a city, or a building church, it’s Jesus’ church. Let the hands be hands, the feet be feet. This is the type of church I’m building.
The bride of Christ- layed down lovers of Jesus who have authentic relationship with God.
I’m excited when I see people rise up to take their place because I can’t do this alone. I’m grateful for those who continue to pray and contribute. Thank you. I love you so much, so does God.
I am praying for you to take your place in your destiny. God bless you.
Give and partner with me to bring the grace of God to people around the world.
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