A Matter Of Trust

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Before I went overseas I had many dreams about wearing a wedding dress getting ready on an airplane.

The wedding dress was symbolic of trust, marrying Jesus, trusting Him, giving my whole life to Him.

And yet I still have trouble trusting Him at times. Like times when He tells me where to go next to minister to the people He needs me to reach. I don’t see the finances for the plane ticket; it slowly comes together but very slowly. Like I have two days left to pull the finances together. If He even wants me there then.

I woke up thinking “I give up. It’s like pulling a dead cow. I tried my best. I give up and surrender. Not by my flesh or effort but by your spirit”.

It was much easier to work for money but now that I trust God for it to do the work He has called me to, sometimes and most of the time it’s a matter of letting go.

I let go.

You won’t abandon me. Why me though? Why of all people did you call me?

Because you choose to trust me even when it’s scary. You choose to face the fears and go through the pain even when you don’t see a way.

That is why you are a pioneer because no one else will do it.

Why won’t anyone else do it?

They don’t trust me.

They don’t believe that I am good.

That is why many have yet to step into what I have called them to. They will rather cling unto a job or a man, something they can see.

You can’t always see me, yet you can hear me.

I can hear you but my heart still battles to trust you.

And that is okay. I know you are fragile, human, imperfect but I only see Jesus in you. Perfect; unblemished; not lacking; abundant. That is all I see.

He paid the price.

I am asking you to see Jesus in you. That is the only truth.

This journey is about intimacy. Not everyone wears a wedding ring with my name on it. Some are unwilling to trust me, I’m waiting patiently and will continue waiting for them.

Woman of God will you trust me? Will you trust me when you don’t see it yet? Will you listen to my still voice? Will you put a ring with my name on it?

Give- Consider sowing into the kingdom and into the hearts of people around the world. 

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